You'll Laugh, You'll Cry

James Kennedy invents THE parlor game for Oh Nine. Dig it.

Rethinking the Resolution Strategy

I was going to keep a few old resolutions around and see if I could make them happen in the oh-nine, but a concerned reader pointed me in the direction of The Fiber Menace, and now I must re-consider.

Okay, reconsideration complete. This gives hooey a bad name. I am told (by said reader) that this guy is serious, and his claims might have some basis in reality. Here's a book review that lends credence to that view.

I have my own opinions, but I would rather let JFB or Western Swing have at it. No punches to the head or below the waist, gentlemen.

How Did I Do? Plus a Note on Blago

It's that time of year where I review my new year's resolutions for the prior year, and then opine on a public figure. I guess that last part isn't really part of the tradition, but oh well. I just need somewhere to say that Blago sure has balls of steel, huh? Appointing Roland Burris to Obama's seat? Wow, and what's with Burris? How f-ing useless to him is his political legacy? About as useless as Ron Dellums is to him, I guess, given what a shitty mayor he is. But I digress. An interesting side note for my non-Chicago homies: Jesse White will refuse to certify Burris' appointment. Jesse is the IL Secretary of State. Ben Smith makes a possibly unintentional funny in the title of his post, "A Procedural Hurdle". Jesse White is also the founder of the Jesse White Tumblers, a very awesome organization that takes kids from poor neighborhoods in Chicago and trains them to be serious gymnasts, tumblers, acrobats, etc.

Anyway, back to my 2008 resolutions:

1. Floss more
I can't really recall how I did on this. Mostly fine. I had a good report on the situation at my December 8 dental appointment, so I will give myself a point on this one.

2. Figure out what it means to add more fiber to one's diet, without actually eating Uncle Sam cereal
Never did figure this out. Maybe I will re-up this one for 2009

3. "Develop an interest" (This means "hobby", not "lover")
4. Stay politically idealistic in this election cycle until at least South Carolina, possibly all the way until February 6
These two dovetailed nicely. As you can tell from my blog, I just made politics my hobby this year. I volunteered for the Obama campaign in the primary, ran for office from March til June, and then did the Voter Protection stuff for Nevada from July til election day. So I guess I might need to re-up this one. Obsessing about the presidency hardly seems as exciting.

5. Devise a system for organizing all the crap on my desk at home
This never happened. I just got a laptop, so I think I will just get rid of the desk. No idea what I am going to do with all the crap I previously piled up on my desk.

6. Get other adult members of my household to join me in more assiduously disposing of compostables in a receptacle from whence, or within which, composting can occur.
This was very successful, actually. Almost all of our food waste goes into this little green bin than gets dumped into a larger green bin at the curb, which the city/waste management/God then empties. Our trash was cut easily by more than 25%, and once Q is out of diapers, we will be down to 50% of our 2007 trash output. I love Oakland/East Bay. They make some New Year's resolutions so easy to keep.

To Reiterate

In order to understand the following four posts, it helps to read them together HERE. Or completely ignore all of this craziness if you are not a huge Wire fan. Thank you.

In the Port/Schools/Press bracket

Definitely the weakest, and proof that season 5 didn't really bring it.

Randy yelling at Carver beat Frank Sobotka's talk with his brother 4-0
DeLonda yelling at Namond beat reporters "mother of 4" talk 4-0
Frank visits Ziggy in jail beat Dukie's eviction 4-0
parallel cops/teachers trainings beat "evacuate" discussion 3-1
Prez explaining intimacy beat Donut opening the teacher's car door 3-1
Nicky looking through the fence beat Prez/Bubs seeing eachother at school 4-0
Bunny and WeeBay talking beat "not even Greek" scene 3-1
Kids trying to catch pigeon beat DeLonda and WeeBay talking 4-0

Bracket match-ups: Randy yelling v. DeLonda yelling; Frank/Ziggy v. Trainings; Intimacy v. Nicky; Bunny and WeeBay v. the pigeon

The Police Bracket

Strong feelings in this one

Bunk/McNulty "fuck" scene beat Prez rearranging the board 4-0
Ray Cole's detective funeral beat the questioning of suspects who don't speak English 4-0
Omar testifying against Bird beat Cheryl/Burrell at hospital 4-0
McNulty at brothel beat search for shot Kima 3-1
Landsman throwing Bubbles back beat Omar buying a suit 4-0
Lester discovering the bodies in the vacants beat Lester getting Avon's picture 3-1
Bunk/Omar's jail talk beat McNulty putting the floater in city jurisdiction 4-0
Bunny's paperbag lecture beat moving the desk 3-1.

Next round match-ups are: "fuck" scene v. funeral; Omar testifying v. Jimmy at brothel; Landsman v. Lester; "Man's got to have a code" vs. paperbag.

The Hall Bracket

In The Hall bracket:
There are some problems in this bracket, three ties. Please cast some breaking votes, so we can move this bracket forward.

Clay Davis testifying beats Stringer/Levy paying him off 3-1
Narese talking to Clay beats the Royce BJ scene 3-1
Norman's "sanctity of the voting booth" beat Carcetti turning Terry down on election night 3-1
Norman on blacks voting for whites beat Carcetti hiring Terry 3-1
Bunny and the deacon at PJs tied with Carcetti fundraising
Carcetti's visit to the governor tied with Carcetti's homeless speech
Carcetti at funeral tied with his first budget meeting
Clay Davis getting served beat Cutty's election day run 4-0.

The Street Bracket

To make this easier, I will break these out by bracket:

In The Streets bracket:
Wallace gets killed beats Omar brings clock to Joe 3-1
Stringer gets killed beats "fight on that lie" 4-0
Snoop buying nail gun beats Omar buying Cheerios 4-0
Dukie/Cutty talk beats DeAngelo restaurant scene 3-1
Bug, Duke and Michael's farewell beat Stringer/Avon balcony scene 3-1
DeAngelo's chess game beats Bodie/McNulty restaurant scene 3-1
Bodie/McNulty park scene beats Omar shooting Mouzone 3-1
Omar stealing the whole package beats Mr. Nugget 3-1

So you see, there are some very tight match-ups in the next round. Wallace v. Stringer. Snoop v. Dukie/Cutty. Boys' farewell v. The chess game. Bodie and McNulty v. Omar.

It's brutal. Let me know what you think.

The Wire Brackets, Part 2 - For serious Wire fans only

Back in March, deep in the throes of my work unhappiness, I concocted The Wire brackets. Sixty-four of the subjectively chosen best scenes from this show paired up for showdown. I had four voters, including myself. Herewith, the first round results. By the way, I am just getting to this now because Wednesday is my last day of work, and I need to clear ALL the shit off my desk.

In The Streets bracket:
Wallace gets killed beats Omar brings clock to Joe 3-1
Stringer gets killed beats "fight on that lie" 4-0
Snoop buying nail gun beats Omar buying Cheerios 4-0
Dukie/Cutty talk beats DeAngelo restaurant scene 3-1
Bug, Duke and Michael's farewell beat Stringer/Avon balcony scene 3-1
DeAngelo's chess game beats Bodie/McNulty restaurant scene 3-1
Bodie/McNulty park scene beats Omar shooting Mouzone 3-1
Omar stealing the whole package beats Mr. Nugget 3-1

So you see, there are some very tight match-ups in the next round. Wallace v. Stringer. Snoop v. Dukie/Cutty. Boys' farewell v. The chess game. Bodie and McNulty v. Omar.

It's brutal. Let me know what you think

In The Hall bracket:
There are some problems in this bracket, three ties. Please cast some breaking votes, so we can move this bracket forward.

Clay Davis testifying beats Stringer/Levy paying him off 3-1
Narese talking to Clay beats the Royce BJ scene 3-1
Norman's "sanctity of the voting booth" beat Carcetti turning Terry down on election night 3-1
Norman on blacks voting for whites beat Carcetti hiring Terry 3-1
Bunny and the deacon at PJs tied with Carcetti fundraising
Carcetti's visit to the governor tied with Carcetti's homeless speech
Carcetti at funeral tied with his first budget meeting
Clay Davis getting served beat Cutty's election day run 4-0.

In The Police bracket: Strong feelings in this one
Bunk/McNulty "fuck" scene beat Prez rearranging the board 4-0
Ray Cole's detective funeral beat the questioning of suspects who don't speak English 4-0
Omar testifying against Bird beat Cheryl/Burrell at hospital 4-0
McNulty at brothel beat search for shot Kima 3-1
Landsman throwing Bubbles back beat Omar buying a suit 4-0
Lester discovering the bodies in the vacants beat Lester getting Avon's picture 3-1
Bunk/Omar's jail talk beat McNulty putting the floater in city jurisdiction 4-0
Bunny's paperbag lecture beat moving the desk 3-1.

Next round match-ups are: "fuck" scene v. funeral; Omar testifying v. Jimmy at brothel; Landsman v. Lester; "Man's got to have a code" vs. paperbag.

Finally, In the Port/Schools/Press bracket: Definitely the weakest, and proof that season 5 didn't really bring it.

Randy yelling at Carver beat Frank Sobotka's talk with his brother 4-0
DeLonda yelling at Namond beat reporters "mother of 4" talk 4-0
Frank visits Ziggy in jail beat Dukie's eviction 4-0
parallel cops/teachers trainings beat "evacuate" discussion 3-1
Prez explaining intimacy beat Donut opening the teacher's car door 3-1
Nicky looking through the fence beat Prez/Bubs seeing eachother at school 4-0
Bunny and WeeBay talking beat "not even Greek" scene 3-1
Kids trying to catch pigeon beat DeLonda and WeeBay talking 4-0

Bracket matck-ups: Randy yelling v. DeLonda yelling; Frank/Ziggy v. Trainings; Intimacy v. Nicky; Bunny and WeeBay v. the pigeon

I know, not enough Bubs. Not even enough Omar. Certainly not enough of the kids.

Okay, the floor is open.

Some Additional Thoughts about E.T.

1. The John Williams score does not hold up well. It's corny and distracting. The movie would be even scarier and more affecting if the soundtrack were subtle. 

2. I haven't watched ET since probably 1982 because the end scared me so much. I will still near tears (except for the annoying score) for the last 35 minutes.

3. Critics probably said this at the time, but since I was 8 I wasn't hip to it, but the story is so obviously an allegory about the affection that children have for their immigrant caregivers in a world of displaced, unfinished suburban sprawl and a burgeoning divorce rate. Recall that this movie was released the last time that immigration reform was on the horizon, and "aliens" and their roles in the lives of Southern California children would have been pretty salient. Also interesting is that Elliott's father has left their mother and moved to Mexico. The implication being that he's left his family for another woman there. 

4. Hipsters of my era (who are in their 30s now) clearly developed their sense of style from this movie and others of that time. There are aviator glasses, trucker hats, puffy vests on C. Thomas Howell, et cetera. Yup, he's in that movie too. It's funny to me that the style of my contemporaries is based on 14-year olds in a movie released in 1982.

Did You Know?

I have a lot to blog about, but did you know that Michael from ET is a mailman in Phoenix now? How wierd is that?

This is my first blog post on my new MacBook laptop. hoot hoot!

ET is terrifying, by the way, even 26 years later.

What Lurks in the Deep Recesses of My Subconscious

If you ever wonder what sick and twisted things dwell deep in my mind . . .

I had this dream last night that I was playing a Dungeons & Dragons-type video game, and then suddenly I was in the game. The Level 9 villain (in addition to a terrifying, unseen dragon) was Larry (of L, Darryl and Darryl) from The Newhart Show. But before I had to battle him, I went into a room where there was a party. There, in a large serving dish, were about a dozen of those giant frosted shredded wheat things. I woke with a start. (Also Q was yelling from the other room).

Does this make me a sick person?

The Tina Fey-ing Must Stop

When I started my little celebrity look-alike contest, I was joking around, looking for a way to flatter myself by comparing myself to Linda Evangelista, Tina Fey and Isabella Rossellini. I didn't realize that Sarah Palin would make it all go terribly awry. Here's what happened: Sarah Palin came on the scene, and Tina Fey played her to great effect on SNL. You've seen it, I'm sure. Now suddenly everyone knows who Tina Fey is, and my neighbor isn't the only one who notices the resemblance.

But okay, enough. I'm over it.

The other day, I was at The Gap, returning jeans for my rapidly thinning husband. Here's the dialogue with the sales clerk. Actually, it was basically a monologue, so I will skip my "mm-hmmms":

Clerk: Will this be all? You look like someone. Who? Who?
Me: Sarah Palin? Tina Fey?
Clerk: Tina Fey! That's it, you're Tina Fey!
Me: No, I'm not. I just look like her. It's the glasses.
Clerk: And the hair. Why did you get the same haircut as her?
Me: I didn't (drowned out explanation about how we both just have wavy thick hair)
Clerk: Well, you look just like her. You could be her. JESSICA! Come here and look at this lady! It's Tina Fey. (other sales clerk looks over and sort of smiles) PAUL, come up to the register. (Paul comes up) It's Tina Fey. Seriously, isn't it? ("I'm not", I mouth). YOU ARE TINA FEY.
(I swipe my card). Let me see your driver's license. I want to see if you're Tina Fey. (To woman in line behind me) It's Tina Fey! Okay, you're not Tina Fet, but YOU LOOK JUST LIKE HER! That's so crazy. I can't believe I had Tina Fey in here.

I thank her and leave. Wierd, annoying. Then the other day Mr. Scob and I were at a holiday party, and near the end, as we were about to leave, the hostess exclaims, "Oh my God, I meant to show you! Did you see Vanity Fair!? You ARE Tina Fey" She uncharacteristically sprints from the room and returns with the magazine. She opens to a picture of TF looking sexy-ish and says, "MMM, Hmmm, that could be you!" She then goes on a little about how she and her husband had been discussing my Tina Feyness and she'd meant to tell me earlier.

As irked as I am about this, I bet Tina Fey is even more annoyed by the comparisons to Sarah Palin. Wow, irritating. I don't know how Sarah Palin feels about being compared to me all the time; she and I don't talk. But if she's getting nearly as much of the mistaken identity stuff as Tina and I are, I think even feel sorry for her. Hopefully Sarah Palin and I can dissolve back into the woodwork, and let everyone just recognize Tina Fey for who she is. That's all I really want out of this.

Jobs I Don't Want

Here's the description from a recent FEMA job posting:

FEMA employees are subject to 24 hour on-call in the event of any emergency. This service may require irregular work hours, work at locations other than the official duty station, and may include duties other than those specified in the employee's official position description. Travel requirements in support of emergency operations may be extensive in nature (weeks to months), with little advance notice, and may require employees to relocate to emergency sites that require functioning under intense physical and mental stress.

Umm, no thanks.

The New Aesthetic

I decided I liked the look of Fungus Everything more than the St. Scobie's traditional dots. There are some problems, of course. Because I don't know html, I can't resize the video or anything fancy like that. But its clean. Like my new, untethered life.

Beardo

And another thing: Tim Harrington has a tv show on Pitchfork.tv called Beardo. Enjoy episode 4:

Some Small Thoughts

Two more interesting points about education. First, the New Yorker has a fascinating story about employers cannot predict whether teachers, and quarterbacks, will succeed. This is all very much on my mind as we look at kindergartens for Li. (I know, *yawn*). I came across an interesting set of numbers in my search, though. The Oakland Unified School District keeps track of Parent Satisfaction at its elementary schools. What's interesting about it is that high rates of parent satisfaction do not necessarily correlate to high Academic Performance Index. In other words, crappy schools have high numbers of satisfied parents, and so do some good schools. Some high achieving schools have low parent satisfaction (you can sort of picture how this would go if the survey day was on the same day a snippy head lice letter went out or something). I know nothing about stats, but if you want to look at the OUSD Enrollment Options on your own, go wild.

In other news, kudos to the people who figured out that branding is very effective with two year olds. I showed Junior Jr. this,
And he said, "Obama!" Which is creepy.

Nine days left at my job.

I realized today that Antarctica probably does not export anything. What other continent can boast that?

The New What

I started a blog for Liam so he'd have a website that keeps all his favorite things in one place. It's called Fungus Everything. He named it himself. Don't worry, I won't write it in his voice, unless he dictates it to me, in which case I will note that. I think its annoying when people write blogs in their children's and pets' voices. More annoying than wierd, given how common it is.

This blog is really for him, so at some point, I might make it a members' only website. But on a trial basis, feel free to check it out.

One piece of technical advice that I need: Blogger does not let you publish .pdf files. Typepad does, but I am cheap like that and don't want to pay to have an account. So how can I post Liam's drawings without converting them to a .pdf? Can I scan his drawings as .jpgs? If so, how do I do that? Thanks for any assistance you can give me on this one.

The Hitler Clip, redux

At this point, you may not even find it funny. Oh well HERE it is.

More Kwips

According to L, the reasons that little boys should get a new toy every day are:

1. It's healthy for the boy
2. It's good exercise for the mommy to go get the toy

The Hitler video

Did the version you see have the subtitles which were quotes from the Blagojevich criminal complaint? One person told me they didn't see subtitles. Another didn't know who Blagojevich was (although Lorin surely does).

To My O Town Homies

In my efforts to develop more fully as a procrastinator, I have stumbled upon some decent or interesting blogs about Oakland that I thought I would share with those of you who care.

The newest one I found is Oakland Geology. I know, total nerdfest. But the geology of Oakland is a facet of our lives whether we choose to think about it or not. The Hayward Fault lies just a few blocks east of my house, and it runs under both a park we like and the Oakland Zoo.

And then there's Oakland Streets, which is sort of Oakland in photo essays. Pretty thoughtful. Living in the O is what it sounds like: thoughts on living in Oakland. A Better Oakland and Future Oakland are both political blogs, although ABO is better, as the author is a serious policy wonk who actually watches all the crazy city council meetings.

It's pretty hard to get actual news about Oakland. The Oakland Tribune is crummy, as is The Montclarion. Chip Johnson's column in the SF Chronicle is always worth a read, because he cannot stand Dellums as mayor. o

There's actually dozens more, but those are the ones I read. I dunno. I thought you might like to know.

This Is Funny

This is good:

The Best Part of the Blago Affair

All the Chicago accents on the news.

He might appoint himself to build an insanity defense.

Mystery Reader

Who is this marvelously wealthy benefactor who owns TWO washing machines, and offers me one? The owner of my local laundromat? Fabulous! Unfortunately the door to our basement is Hobbit-sized so we can only have a Fisher-Price Lil Homemakers Stackables ™ laundry set up. Which is why they keep blowing out. Q changes his clothes literally dozens of times every day. Thanks for the offer though, Daddy Warbucks.

Meanwhile, I am blogging this while I wander around Albany CA trying to walk to Target, which apparently cannot be done. Don't even ask.

Welcome to My Headspace

I have been feeling wicked low about this blog lately. Maybe it was boring myself to death about the DC teachers' contract that was the nail in the coffin, but even before that, I had some form of blogging flu. My blogging is sluggish, nauseous, I throw some stuff up there on the screen and then go back to bed. It's not good. Certainly no way to maintain my teeny readership. But the honest truth is, if I blogged about my life as it was really happening, you'd tell me I wasn't better yet, go home til this thing has run its course.

My experience is, you have to blog through these moments. Just type til something funny or interesting stuff strikes. Its hard to know what to write when the Blagojevich Criminal Complaint is on the floor next to my desk, beckoning me with its ribald humor and mockery of the democratic system. If David Simon had invented Blago, we would have shook our heads, saying, "This guy isn't real." Instead Simon had to invent the more toned-down Clay Davis to fill the role of the pay-to-play, horse-trading criminally greedy politician. Sheeee-it.

Anyway, my life is overwhelmingly pre-occupied with issues too boring to discuss. E.g., the washing machine is broken, so I have to spend my non-working hours beating our clothes against a rock in the backyard under the hose. The kids seem to think Santa is coming this year, so I am trawling E-Bay for a tiny guitar for Q, who also wants a "cooter". That means scooter. Only 21 days left at my job. Soup party menu to plan, soup dislike still left to grapple with. Adding 4 goldfish to the family has turned out to be a lot more responsibility than I bargained for. Schools for kids. Should we get another car? Gar gar gah gar gar gar. That's a pirate song. This is my boring, satisfying breeder middle class happy life, and there's nothing to write about.

Poor me.

Love Notes From my Husband

Some women get sweet nothings, here’s the kind of romance I enjoy. An email from Mr. Scob, in its entirety:

 

GENERAL CATBURD:
Mr. President, I am a soldier.  And I'm a damn good one.  I've
got enough decorations to snap a Christmas tree.  All I'm trying
to say is, and I hope I speak for everyone in this room, is that
I am scared.  I'm barely holding my... fudge, right now.

Cut to SENATOR CUNNINGHAM.  She is disgusted.

SENATOR CUNNINGHAM:
Stop acting like a goddamn schoolgirl, General, and pull
yourself together.

Can Someone Explain This?

Over a year ago, we got our TV room painted. I love the color (a very subtle blue), but it was recently pointed out to me that the guy didn't paint the corners. Where each wall meets is a thin white line. There's a penumbra of white around each window, too, I just noticed. Its too intentional to be an oversight. Why did he do that?

DC Teachers Give-and-Take

So I got an email from a very thoughtful and smart person I know who has actual knowledge of the DC education system as an advocate for disabled children. Here's a part of her email:

but isn't the issue not firing people for cause, but rather that it takes years to get rid of teachers who are getting mediocre results? It is those teachers who are just not inspiring that we need to replace--not the ones who would otherwise be subject to discipline.

You know I was raised a good pro-union kid, which a solidarity forever tshirt and all, but sometimes I really do think DC is different. It takes super balls to get anything done w/DC schools.

First of all, I don't think it's just DC schools. I think a lot of people feel this way about most failing school districts. I recall hearing similar criticisms when I was living in Chicago, and Oakland Unified is so in-the-crapper that a state administrator had to be appointed. DC generally has major governance problems (ahem, no taxation without representation) so it might feel more acute, but I think the same argument plays out in most places.

Second, it seems we agree that teachers who warrant discipline can be disciplined, and that there isn't really a chronic problem of abusive teachers at issue here. The problem seems to be, as my reader puts it, "inspiring" teachers. Now, I question the value of this category. In 20 years of education, I can only think of a handful of teachers who were actually inspiring. From the rest, I learned about the Lennie Lenape Indians, trigonometry, gerunds, The Mill on the Floss. If you wipe out everyone who isn't inspiring, you have no one left. This is what I was getting at in my earlier post: "inspiring" is too subjective.

So does my reader mean teachers who have basically given up? The clock watchers? The bureaucrats? I think so. So my question back is, how did those people get that way? What are the conditions in which they work? I am (possibly unfairly) assuming that these teachers face overcrowded classrooms of undernourished children, without current materials, a teacher's aide, or involved and supportive parents. They are a couple of years from a decent retirement. Efforts earlier in their career to get better resources were futile, and possibly laughed at by their peers.

Why exactly is the failure of the DC schools their fault? Do they have all these wonderful things with happy, well-fed children and still they act like insolent teenagers? Why does Rhee make destroying their lives and careers her first priority? When they are gone, there will still be no decent books, healthy children and involved parents, and then Rhee will be the last one standing, and the only one to blame.

A failing city school seems to be a lot like a failing city hospital. Unhealthy patients, overcrowding, people in the ER for the flu, not enough supplies, peeling paint, staff taxed to their limit. But we rarely hear complaints that the healthcare system would be better if the hospital staff were more (euphemistically) inspiring. Diagnoses are missed, infections are spread. That's understood as a resource problem, not a staff problem. A new influx of residents and nurses only props up the system until those individuals are unable to do their job. I just suggest that our education systems be understood in comparable ways.

Finally, I think that if there was real leadership (and not Rhee's Blackberry-dependent petulance), teachers would either get on board with efforts to reform the school or they would leave rather than do the job they were asked to do. I give Rhee another 18 months before she declares victory and moves on. If she wants to stay and make real change, she'll change her attitude.

Prop 8 - The Musical

Enjoy!

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

Stuck in My Craw

So here comes what may the boringest blog post ever. Bear with me or not, I need to get this off my chest. I promise, you will be disappointed.

Michelle Rhee, the Chancellor of the D.C. public school system has gotten a lot of press lately over her proposal to create a two-tier compensation system in the District. See, for example, Time Magazine. She proposes to pay teachers up to $130,000 a year (salary and merit bonuses) if they will agree to drop tenure. In her system, tenured teachers would make their standard salary (around $65,000) in order to keep their job security, while other teachers would gamble on the higher pay by opting out of the current system. The Washington Teachers' Union has not brought this proposal to a vote, allegedly because they believe a generation gap among current teachers would create an unbreachable division.

Supposedly, Rhee's proposal is being watched with bated breath by most in the education world. She acknowledges that she wants to break the union, and nationwide, school districts are waiting to see if she can pull it off. Supposedly, her efforts are necessary because teachers just cannot be fired, because their unions always fight, and win, to keep them in their positions.

My gut reaction to this, after eight and a half years of being a union-side labor lawyer, is that this is utter and complete bullshit. I willingly acknowledge that unions occasionally (and in some cases, often) champion unpopular employees to vindicate political positions or procedural details. But that doesn't make bad employees un-fire-able. Let's look for a moment at the Washington Teachers' contract as it pertains to discipline.

3. Suspensions or discharge

In the case of suspensions, or discharge, the official taking the action shall provide the employee with advance written notice of the charge[s], which shall include a specific statement of the evidence supporting such charge[s], no later than ten (10) school days prior to the effective date of the discipline. At the option of DCPS, an employee shall either remain on the job or in pay status for the entire ten (10) day period. Within five (5) days of the receipt of the notice, the employee has the right to review all documents related to the charges and to provide a written reply along with supporting documents against the charges. The decision shall go into effect as stated unless upon consideration of all relevant facts by the official taking the action, the action is to be modified, at which time the employee and the union shall be so notified in writing of the modification. The disciplinary action or discharge shall not take effect until the requirements of this article are satisfied. All suspensions shall be administered in a manner which causes the teacher to lose no more pay than the actual days of suspension.

C. The initiation of the disciplinary action
shall be taken no later than thirty (30) school days after the supervisor’s knowledge of the alleged infraction. In cases requiring an investigation, any investigation conducted by or on behalf of DCPS into the alleged infraction shall be completed, with any investigation report provided to the employee involved and to the WTU within thirty (30) days after the supervisor’s knowledge of the alleged infraction. This time limit may be extended by mutual consent, but if not so extended, must be strictly adhered to.

There are a number of procedural hurdles described in these two sections, but I want to say two things about them: (1) they are pretty standard, although more favorable to employees than many collective bargaining agreements; (2) much of what is included is based on U.S. Constitutional law. 14th Amendment due process requires notice of intent to discipline and a hearing of the reasons for the decision (public employees have a property interest in continued employment).

The timelines are strict, but intended to prevent the employer from pissing around; if you want to take action, take action. Shit or get off the pot. It means the employer bears the burden of doing their job. And that's the rub. Much of what is described as a problem with the teachers is actually a problem with the supervisors, the district and even the precious new chancellor. If Michelle Rhee wants to know how to get rid of bad teachers, she would be well-advised to read her contract with the union. It's all spelled out there in black and white. Step one, step two, step three. The reason that the steps are particular is that the things teachers are accused of doing are highly subjective. For every complete idiot of a teacher that I have had, I can guarantee that there are 25 students who thought that teacher was brilliant. Should Ms. Mancini have gotten fired because I thought she was an utter imbecile? Maybe. But probably I was a 14-15-16 year old asshole (I had her three years in a row), and, gosh golly, here I am an educated person, and she's either retired or still teaching somewhere.

If you look at that contract, the careful steps do not apply in cases of corporal punishment, sexual harassment or abuse of a student. Mediation and respect are called for in cases involving complaints. These are appropriate. If that District doesn't want to exercise its own rights - by telling teachers that they must be in their classroom before class starts rather than at the bell, and disciplining people who fail to follow the rules - why should individual employees suffer?

This is one of the topics that kept me up late. In my disturbed half-sleep, I thought of many prescriptions for Ms. Rhee and the WTU. But now that I have read the contract, I see its all laid out for her. That Time article strongly suggests that she's only recently bothered to read her contract. If she understood it, she'd learn that employees must file their grievances within 10 days of the discipline (harder than it sounds for many people), that arbitrators are not bound by the formal rules of evidence in hearing each case, and that individual employees have no personal right to arbitration. She'd also understand that basic principles of fairness and respect underpin that relationship. It's all in there, if she only knew where to look.

What's Next for the Nascent Obama Administration

Now that I am leaving my job, I am actually becoming interested again in matters related to the Labor movement. Again last night I was up at 3:15 a.m. musing on some boring-as-sh%$ labor topic, which I will now share with you.

There was some mishegoss from labor circles about why Obama did not announce his pick for Secretary of Labor along with the rest of his economic team last week. People felt slighted and generally fear that labor will play second fiddle in the recovery. I think that latter sentiment might have some truth to it, but I think there are a couple of other factors in play.

First of all, I think Obama is going to roll out Labor, Energy and Interior together as part of his Green/Energy Initiative. Last week, he brought out his economic team together; today, he put his foreign policy team in place. Green/Energy will be next, and then Healthcare reform (Health and Human Services, Surgeon General). This is probably the order of Obama's priorities. Green/Energy gets a boost over Healthcare because it can be tied back to the economic recovery plan.

I think Labor will be placed with the Energy initiative because the message Obama wants to send is about the future of work in this country, not the past. He will be saying, essentially, that this is where the new jobs are going to be.

A second reason that Labor gets rolled out separately from the economic team, and why Obama will send a signal that this is about the future, and not the past, is that the Labor movement is in utter shambles, and there is political divisiveness in every considered potential appointee. The AFL-CIO and Change to Win are no closer to reconciliation than they were the day they split. SEIU is riven by infighting. This is going to be a tough pick, and there will be some backlash from some part of the labor movement regardless of who is chosen. I suspect Obama will unroll this closer to Christmas, or on a Friday afternoon, so no one needs to hear the complaining.

I don't have favorites for Secretary of Labor (other than, say, myself), but I do agree with Jay that Tennessee Tuxedo needs to be appointed "with all deliberate haste" to the position of Director of the National Black and White Zoo.

More Vay-Kay Photos

Several clay pigeons died for our recreational pleasure.


Q-ball rides.

So Much to Write About

We went to South Carolina for Thanksgiving, and the environs were not conducive to blogging, i.e. I was too busy/tired/surrounded by people to sit down and compose a thought. I have so much to blog about that I made notes for myself yesterday, and spent much of the early morning hours (2;30-4:00 a.m.) pondering what may be the most boring blog post ever to be composed. It's upcoming. But first, some vacation photos:

The plane ride there.
At the stables.L doing god-knows-what on the back of a horse.

What The...?

I think I am a reasonably intelligent person. Not Harvard Business School smart, maybe, but I went to the University of Chicago, and I have three degrees and no bar complaints against me (that would be the California State Bar, by the way). People say I'm smart, funny, trust me to do reasonably complicated intellectual tasks. So then why the HELL do I not understand a word of this article: Obama's Seven Lessons for Radical Innovators?

All I can say is, thank GOD Obama did not read that article before he ran for President. Otherwise, he would still be sitting in his office in Springfield, Illinois, holding his head from the pain of trying to understand what it even means.

How to Drive Yourself Crazy, and Then Sane Again

How to drive yourself insane: Decide at 7:00 p.m., while trying to get kids to bed, that you need to learn how to knit again. Attempt to find knitting needles. Settle for chopsticks. Try to decipher pictures of yarn being cast onto needles. Fail. (You are left-handed, by the way).

How to become sane again: Check YouTube for How to cast on knitting left handed.

(This assumes that you think sane=knitting with chopsticks)

Update: I confirmed that I am capable of knitting, but also that chopsticks are an insufficient tool for the task. This means its unlikely that I will fulfill my son's command of earlier this evening, "Knit me a very warm blanket tonight! Mom!"

More on the Fish

Here are their names, followed by the birth order number of the child who named each: Max (1), Frump (2), Wallace (1), and Gromit (2).

As to the question of whether goldfish mortality has been broached: It has. At least with Thing 1, who responds with a serious look on his face, as if to reassure me, "Fish die, right mom?" Number 2 could seriously not give a s**t. Although if someone asks, "how are the fish?" He races out of the room, yelling, "I check!" He doesn't usually make it to the kitchen to see, though. He usually gets distracted before he gets there.

The Dumb Things Parents Do

When you are a parent, you do a lot of weird and sometimes stupid things: volunteer to make all the Christmas cookies for the class, scream at your child for doing a head stand, having another kid. Today, I got the kids 4 goldfish. What started as a promise to get one fish quickly became a major undertaking. Why? Because they are 4 for a dollar. Four fish means you need a much bigger bowl, and plants, etc etc. Some of you might not think this is crazy. Maybe you got a puppy when you were 7 months' pregnant, so 4 fish seems like no biggie. But we are going away for a week in 6 days, which means I have to find someone to watch the damn fish. My fish, because the kids will be negative helpful, and Mr. Scobie has already disowned me. Better than getting a puppy - or pregnant - right?

Back to The Wire

Now y'all know, I am crazy about two things: Barack Obama and The Wire. And I am over the moon about Obama's election. Sh*t's changing already. I saw a headline today: "Obama plans to close Guantanamo". Amazing. It hasn't even been a week and the cloud is lifting, the sun will shine.

I do have one little lump of worry in my throat, though. The short-hand for all this, in Wire terms: "It's a new day in Baltimore."

For those of you who refuse to take my advice and just watch the damn show, I will give a little context. At the end of season 4, Daniels has been promoted by Mayor Carchetti, who has promised him that much-needed change is coming to the Balmawr Po-leese. Daniels shares with Lester Freemon, a long-suffering homicide detective, the above-quoted sentiment. At the beginning of season 5, we learn that things are worse than they were before, and our heroes spin off in unfortunate and, in some cases, unethical circumstances. Freemon is disgraced by a bogus serial killer created with McNulty; Daniels has resigned under pressure and blackmail. It's a total (excuse my language) fucking tragedy.

And so, I worry. My worry is not alleviated by this:


Please will.i.am, do not doom the Obama administration!

*Hey, Wire nerds, I just realized (when I tried to find Daniels' speech on YouTube) that New Day was also the name of the drug co-op run by Stringer and Prop Joe. Once again, Simon and Burns amaze me with their genius.

Wow.

http://change.gov/page/s/application

That's the website to apply for positions in the Obama-Biden administration. Scroll down to the bottom of that page ad read the non-discrimination language. Wow. Sexual orientation and identity are both protected classifications. Monumental in even the smallest details.

My two year old

Is carrying a tiny lemon around the house, saying, "this is amazing creatures" repeatedly. "Open the creatures right now. Get the seeds out. Cut in another half, the 'mazing creatures."

With Nothing Left to Talk About

I've turned to researching my next car. VW Jetta TDI Sportswagen. It's adorable. Clean diesel, too.

Now back to politics. I saw something on Facebook today about a movement to repeal Prop 8 in 2010. Why would we wait that long? Why not put it on one of those obscure election days before the next federal election, and then run an actually decent and effective campaign, where only the people who give a shit come out to vote on it. The No on Prop 8 campaign blew chunks, and whoever was responsible for that should publicly bear some responsibility for fucking up what should have been an easy (relatively) win. Back to the drawing board, toot sweet.

Change Can Happen, And Happen Fast

My PDA battery died last night so I couldn't post again after I left HQ. I spent a decent part of my night driving around Vegas, first to a wierd bar to watch the final returns, although I knew he had won while I was on my way there, then to my hotel to dump the car and get a cab to the Rio for the Dems party. I was happy to spend the evening partly alone, however, because I felt very emotional. I cried intermittently, partly from joy and partly from exhaustion.

Then when I saw Jesse Jackson crying, I almost started bawling. I felt a little terrible watching him have such a private moment in such a public way. Jesse has lived in the public eye for nearly a half-century, so in some ways it was fitting that he would cry deeply among a million people, televised to millions more. He's a little like Zelig, isn't he? Present at so many world-changing events. He used to seem to second string, the guy standing next to King, but not the man himself. Even though Jesse Jackson had a hard time with the Obama candidacy in some ways, very few people deserve as much credit as Jackson for making it happen. In fact, it is the millions and millions of people who have stood next to our moral leaders over the past century that have made this moment, and our future, possible. This time, there were over 50 million men and women standing with a moral leader, and change is not only possible, it has happened, and we have the capacity, and infrastructure, to make it happen again and again.

So I felt okay being alone, because I wasn't.

The Dem party was actually a rally of sorts for the Obama volunteers, and was winding down when we got there. It was nice to mill around with a thousand other people just beaming at eachother and being super-polite and nice. Lots of people had gotten dressed up and were treating it like a real party, dancing and drinking.

I want to thank all my friends and family who have been so supportive of me, whether they support my candidate, I mean, president, or not. You have all borne my enthusiasm graciously, and even been a bit infected by it. This is just the first day, though, of a long and hopefully transformative journey for our country and our world. I can't wait to find out the role that I, we, can play in it.

gotta get out of here

all is quiet. i look and feel like a ragged mess. gonna go get a beer, and then head to the Rio for the after party. more as events warrant

Still Not Over

The last real issue bubbling is that a LOT of people registered outside the Sahara DMV and their registrations were never turned in. So we have gotten a two dozen calls from upset people about this.

Also, we have some asshole pollworkers who are telling people that they will kick people out of the polls at 7pm. And telling people that their provisional ballots won't be counted. We are doing what we can do correct that problem.

And don't worry, I will go to the party.

things are really winding down

calls are slowing down, or getting sillier. people who are just literally now realizing that they have forgotten to vote. Nevada had early voting for two full weeks plus mail ballots. I don't mean to be dismissive of these voters, but its supremely irritating that they are just getting on the ball. Oh, well. Every vote should be counted. Not everyone is an obsessed maniac like me.

The Democrats are having a party at The Rio tonight. I hope that I will have the energy to make it that far tonight. I am wicked tired.

Different Problems

So the kinds of problems have shifted a little bit: late this afternoon, we have had more folks with old felonies who say that they have voted in the intervening years and are now dumped from the rolls. The ex-felon rules are complicated so its a little hard to walk people through the details. Another issue is that some folks who are now at the wrong polling places don't feel that they have time (they have 2 hours) to get to the proper polling place.

There are a lot of callers to our national hotline who are little just now realizing that they need to vote. One called from Arizona, another from Tennessee. Annoying. This election has been going on for what? Two years?

Things are Quiet

But not too quiet. We aren't getting many calls and the worker influx hasn't materialized. Maybe at 5?! Or 7!?

7 is when the polls close, and anyone in line can vote.

FW: Beat this, EP Vegas!!!

From our friends in Reno:
Subject: Beat this, EP Vegas!!!

From J.D. Deming at rgj.com:
A mysterious 6 foot tall robot was kicked out of a Reno polling station this afternoon by polling officials. The sophisticated robot carried a sign reading, "Say No To Computerized Voting". The Robot also talked and seemed to be remotely controlled from an unknown location. It cracked jokes as it strolled. Poll station officials finally came out to instruct the robot to move out of the exclusive "no electioneering zone" which it slowly did, making it's way up Monroe St. in SW Reno.

Fw: Brentwood, NH

From my MIL Date: Tuesday, November 4, 2008, 3:47 PM Brentwood NH had long long lines when they finally opened at 8 am!  Generally upbeat and feeling confident at the local headquarters (to about six small towns)  At 10:30 there was a big bang (there was tree cutting along the nearby power lines) and all the power went out.  paper ballots, not to worry, but did put everyone into a spin.  Of the sign holders there were about a dozen for various Democratic candidates (Obama, Shaheen for Senate) and only one, just one, for McCain.  but we offerred her water and snacks, anyway.   Dixville Notch went for Obama 3 to 1, that seemed to seal it for these folks. We tried to do our "voter ID" data entry over the cell phones, but system crashed, so had to do it from headquarters (Painters Union) on computer.    -   Anne

provisional ballots blow chunks

Seriously, its so stupid. Its completely confusing and no one even thinks they will ever be counted.

wow

The registrar of voters has told us that the turnout may hit 85% in Clark County, where Las Vegas is.

two things about to happen

Its almost 3, which means that NH polls are about to close, and that will start to cascade of election results.

Also, casino workers get off a shift at 3pm, so we expect to see an onslaught of voters in the next half hour. So we will need to be answering calls when the best stuff is happening. Email me interesting stories you hear.

Something of Lull

Things are slightly quiet, although we are busy doing legal research on some of the wierd questions that have come in.

oops. power outage at Chuck Minker Sports Complex. So I think that they are bringing in mobile units.

so that's exciting.

Live Blog 5

Smokey Robinson voted at one of our polling places. Sadly, my poll monitor missed him, and is totally bummed out.

live blog 4

Getting wicked tired and hungry now. Unfortunately, there's sort of an antagonism growing at a couple of precincts where the poll workers are giving incorrect advice and then feeling beleaguered when they get called on it by the poll watcher. But for the most part, people are reporting that the voting is very orderly and very exciting. One monitor said she was almost moved to tears to see families voting together, people of all ethnic and racial backgrounds, disabled and able, old and young. She said voters are in a good mood, very excited. Its totally gorgeous outside. We are in a tiny room, with 7 people huddled around a conference room table. tap tap tap tap tap.

Live Blog 3

Here are the issues: 1. poll workers are just having people vote provisionally rather then figuring out where they ought to be voting, checking the inactive list (to get activated, the voter just needs to vote), etc. The problem with this is that in Nevada provisional ballots only have federal races on them. 2. poll workers don't understand that poll observers should be allowed to talk to voters outside of the polling place. this is a big problem at churches and the law is not clear about the rules at those locations. 3. African American male told he wasn't registered to the same poll as his white wife, although they've lived at the same place for 8 years. The supervisor intervened and found the man's information. So its sporadic stuff like that. Some of the poll workers are antagonist and feel put-upon, particularly because the Obama people are out in force. 4. Also, cops have shown up at a bunch of places but the sheriff has been cool about pulling people off. I am getting hungry!

Live Blog 2

Things here at Legal Command Center are brisk but not overwhelming. We've had some broken machines, and some voters turned away because of "voided" registrations. One woman has family members who were arrested over the weekend and may not get out in time to vote.

All in all, exciting but things are under control. I am wicked tired.

Election Day Live Blog

It's 4:15 a.m. I'm in a hotel room in Las Vegas. I can't sleep. I have heard construction vehicles all night. Vegas hotel rooms are funny. They purport to be luxurious (well, here at the Monte Carlo), but there are amenities. No coffemaker. Internet is $15/day. No extra lock on the door. Which is very strange.

On the news, I can see that there are long lines at polls on the east coast. I tear up.

I'm "Famous"

Oakland North blog has a piece about my voter protection efforts.

Who I Am Voting For

This post will mean close to nothing to my non-Cali readers, and they aren't endorsements. Endorsements ain't worth sh*t (unless you're Colin Powell, I guess) . Putting aside the governing principle of my hero Norman Wilson ('the sanctity of the voting booth is the cornerstone of democracy"), here's how I plan to vote (early) tomorrow.

POTUS: Barack Obama. I think I've laid out my reasoning on this position ad nauseum, so I won't bore you with the details.

U.S. Rep: Barbara Lee. Ridicule the "barbara lee speaks for me" bumper sticker if you will, but the woman has been a truly progressive and independent voice in Congress.

State Senator: Loni Hancock. Loni's the only Democrat in this race, but I supported her in the primary because I thought she was the candidate with more vision and leadership. Those terms are typically empty, but in Loni's case, it meant that she took on difficult issues in creative ways, even if it didn't mean winning all the time. By contrast, her opponent championed little bills that gave her a tally of laws to her name but little real change.

14th Assembly: Nancy Skinner, though she has no competition. People I know like her, and she has a looong record as an environmentalist, but I don't know much about her. Still, her politics are in the right place.

Judge, Alameda Superior Court: Dennis Hayashi. His opponent is a former prosecutor. There are enough of those on the bench.

City of Oakland, Councilmember at large: Rebecca Kaplan. Rebecca's great, and I give her a real endorsement. That means, please tell other people to vote for her too!

AC Transit Director: Chris Peeples (and only because I've met him, so I am not even sure it warrants recommendation, although he seemed like a nice person)

Prop 1A: Yes. The basic lack of a rail system in CA is an embarassment. I was an avid Amtrak user in high school, traveling to DC, Boston and Providence often, and alone. It was safe, comfortable and fast. The fact that you can't get to LA, much less San Ho, from SF on the train is just baffling.

Prop 2: Yes

Prop 3: No. Not sure why this bothers me. My logic is awful here. I am tired of single issue bonds (but see Prop 1A) and I feel like medical care in CA/nationally needs an overhaul, not just childrens' hospital funding. Plus, the childrens' hospitals in Cali are among the most anti-union employers in the healthcare industry. So I am just not feeling Prop 3.

Prop 4: No. Anti-choice a-holes trot this out biennially. It aims to require parental notification before abortion. The fact is, an overwhelming majority of young women consult with a parent before having an abortion, and the ones who don't, feel that there are reasons why their parents will not be supportive. Those women turn to aunts, teachers, sisters, mentors. Parental notification just sends women underground to find abortions. If the lifers want to end abortion, they should support birth control, sex ed, and prenatal care, and a world where raising a child is not a debtors' prison for young people.

Prop 5: Yes. Rehab over incarceration = good.

Prop 6: No. Again with the micro-budgeting by ballot. Let the legislature control the purse strings.

Prop 7: No. I haven't fathomed the reasons, but am willing to go along with every major environmental group on their renunciation of Prop 7 and 10.

Prop 8: no, no, no, no, no, no, NO.

Prop 9: No. This is the supposed victims' rights prop. Its redundant, a poor use of money, and while it tugs on one's heart strings, its mean and vindicative. I am just not a retributionist.

Prop 10: No. Same reason as 7.

Prop 11: Yes. And here's one of these props where I part ways with my friends in Labor, who oppose this. Prop 11 would create a multi-partisan commission to study and redraw legislative districts, in order to end gerrymandering by the dominant party in the legislature. Labor (and other special interests) do not like this because it minimizes their voice in the process of creating legislative districts. My view is, we hate gerrymandering when the Republicans do it. Why is it okay or any less democratic when we do it? And I know that the existing process has resulted in districts which are represented by members of groups largely excluded in the past but is also means there is almost no competition for seats.

Prop 12: Yes. Notwithstanding my previous positions on micro-targeting budgets, I like veterans and think they can use a hand when they leave the service. Plus, I believe that investments in veterans pays dividends. During the recent passage of the newest GI Bill, I heard Jim Webb say that this country got back $7 for every $1 it spent on GI education and mortgage subsidy. Maybe it was more.

Prop N: Yes.

Prop NN: No. I am for more police, but the city of Oakland has not met the last hiring goals from 2002 yet, and can't manage its finances at all, so this is a bad way to tie up city money.

Prop OO: No. Pits parks and recs against after-school programs, and deprives the city of funding regardless of city needs. Let the city council do its J-O.

Prop VV: Yes.

Prop WW: Yes.

Still awake out there?

Concerted Activity Lives Another Day

Call Center workers walk out rather than read anti-Obama "robo-call"- esque script. The best part about this story for me is not the pro-Obama part of it; its the fact that workers are acting together against working conditions which offend them. This is the second direct action I have seen reported that relates to Obama. Earlier this month, West Virginia coal miners walked off the job when the NRA came to their workplace to film an anti-Obama video.

Given the historical precedent of American presidents and striking workers (think the Great Railroad Strike of 1877, Youngstown Sheet & Tube Co., and PATCO), even I am wary that there will be a return to collective action under an Obama administration. On the other hand, Obama is an organizer at heart, and he understands effective direct action as the fastest way to solve most problems. Its interesting to me that two small groups of people who are in Obama's demographic Unlikely list (Hoosiers and West Virginians) respond to him (or against McCain/NRA) so strongly as risk economic retribution from their employers. Given how hard it is to get people to act in their own economic interest, its remarkable to see people acting in their political interest.

Something about Nothing

One of our secretaries is doing GOTV work in New Mexico, and she's blogging about it at Jilala for Obama. She got the shake Obama's hand on Saturday night. How does he manage to be so sincere after nearly 2 years on the campaign trail? It's amazing.

That said, I am super-ready for this election season to be over. I am very anxious and almost sick of my own candidate. The closest feeling I can conjure is the way I felt in the days leading up to my wedding. For those of you who were there, you may recall that I was basically a basketcase, I was so nervous. I have never really figured out why. Anyway, in the days before, I was so excited and anxious that it made me mad at Mr. Scobie. How dare he make me this happy!? Obama being elected would not exactly be as awesome as marrying BD, but in the context of our current political/economic environment, its pretty awesome. And I feel like crap being so excited.

I joined Twitter today because Laura Ingalls twitters. After trying it out a couple of times, I think I have social networking system overload. I am now on blogger, facebook, linkedin and twitter. I don't bother with friendster. And sadly, I never even get to hang out with most of my friends. It bums me out. A dude with 700 facebook friends held and party, and only one friend came. Too depressing.

And This Is Funny

I am pleased to say I can't think of anyone to send this to, but maybe you can. Click here.

Why Doesn't The NYT Do Its Own Work

Today's New York Times has three articles (2 news and 1 op-ed) that cite Politico as the breaking source of news. That's a website. Isn't the New York Times like the biggest and most important paper in the universe? Do they no longer do investigative reporting? I know they do, but they feel particularly lagging right now.

Okay, now watch this:

My Yes On Prop 2 Post, plus more on Prop 8

Thanks for all the kind words on my No on Prop 8 post. Although I teared up when I wrote it, it wasn't hard to write. Especially not hard when you consider what it's like for loving couples to have their marital status subject to the whims of the Mormon Church, who are outspending everyone to pass Prop 8. For all y'all who didn't already click over to No on Prop 8 to donate, please do so now. Or you can donate at ActBlue Equality for All. Thank you.

Now, on to Prop 2. Prop 2 is one of those "only in California" propositions. Its easy to be dismissive and annoyed by the micro-legislating that happens in this state. Prop 2 requires farmers to provide animals with enough space in their cage to turn around. Not that big a deal. The people who oppose this measure - Corporate Ag, for example - say that it will make it cost-prohibitive to provide so much space to chickens, and that "foreign" farmers (like those in Nevada) will be able to provide lower cost eggs. These are myths. And its the same clap-trap that was floating around 100 years ago when The Jungle was written.

An analogous argument by the No on Prop 2 group goes like this: "We can't take the mercury/lead out of this product because then you'll buy it cheaper from China with lead in it." No one buys this argument, right? At least not any more.

I also think that this humane approach to our food is a healthier and better way for us to live, and leads to healthier lives for humans, as food consumers and as workers. Let me tell a story: For years, the farmworkers union lobbied for a law that would require growers to provide fresh water to farmworkers. Every year, the measure was soundly defeated by legislators who had been lobbied by growers who said that it was cost prohibitive, blah blah blah. Finally, it occurred to someone to amend the Penal Code, adding "and farmworkers" to a law which required that circus elephants have fresh water available to them at all times. Once the legislature realized that it was criminal to keep water from elephants, they were shamed politically into making sure workers got it. The way we treat animals in our society is a marker for the way we treat other human beings. Please vote yes on Prop 2.

My No On Prop 8 Post

One of these days, seriously, I will get around to discuss some down-ticket races. For now, I want to write about the other race that fills my mind, and my heart, Proposition 8.

Let me tell you a story: June 26, 1983, was my parents' 12th wedding anniversary. I was barely awake that morning when my dad told me to sit on the couch. I had been away at camp the previous week, and was wiped out from the mediocre food, very little sleep and the terrifying tales of the campers that died before me at Camp Dick Runyon. My sister and I say lumpenly on the couch, too sleepy to be curious. I don't remember the exact speech, but my father told us that he was moving out and that he and my mom were splitting up. I remember that they said it wasn't our fault, but they had never fought with one another that I could recall (well there were a couple of instances but nothing ongoing), so it must be our fault.

Later, my father called a good friend who shared their wedding anniversary to tell him the sorry news. I was laying on my parents' bed listening. My father was systematically dismantling a life that they had chosen together.

1983 was a bad year to be a gay man coming out of the closet, but it was also the first year that it was really possible, at least in rural Indiana. In November, my mom moved us back east, and my dad moved to Fort Wayne, where there was a surprisingly supportive gay-ish community. Although I knew my father's boyfriends over the years, I never told anyone that he was gay until I got to high school, and even then only told a couple of friends. By college, it made me a novelty. My father's journey was probably harder before that day in 1983, and my mother's was harder after it.

Now I am happily married. And the one thing that I wish for both of my parents is that they could have had this marriage when they were young. An honest marriage. An in-love marriage. Now that I have children, I have the same hope for them. And I now live in a rare place in history, and in geography, and in the law, where that is possible, no matter who they fall in love with.

I highly doubt that I have readers who support Prop 8, which would write discrimination into the California constitution by banning gay marriage. You probably already knew how I felt about this, and were planning to vote NO on Prop 8. But please take the extra step, and please DONATE to No on Prop 8.

Liking Clinton Again

Just as some predicted, the wounds inflicted on the Democratic Party by the prolonged primary season have started to heal. All but a few high profile Clinton supporters have gone over to Obama, and most people, including Obama, acknowledge that the long pre-season made Obama a much better debater and candidate. Without that primary season, Obama would never have known the extent of his weakness among Appalachian voters in PA, for example.

So are we ready to like the Clintons again? Bill Richardson is, even if Bill Clinton doesn't feel the same way. And while some grouse that Hillary doesn't seem to be doing much for Obama, I suspect she is being very helpful to him in targeted ways, and being extremely helpful to her Congressional colleagues, buying back a lot of good will with her fundraising talents.

So what about me? Can I like them again? I had been feeling neutral on Hillary, and annoyed with Bill Clinton for his failure to step up for Obama, and then I read this bit in Politico. From th Al Smith dinner, by Jonathan Martin:

And on the former president's odd pledge to avoid campaigning for Obama until after the Jewish High Holidays, McCain "you've got to admire that ecumenical spirit."

"I just know Bill would like to be out there now stumping for Barack until the last hour of the last day," he said. "Unfortunately, he is constrained by his respect for any voters who might be observing the Zoroastrian New Year."

Hillary got a huge laugh at this.

This is a pretty insightful vignette. Bill really wanted Hillary to win. She didn't. For the sake of her career, she needs to get over her loss. But does Bill? In fact, if he got over it faster than she did, wouldn't that be a dog sort of thing to do? That's what loving husbands do. They stay mad for you. Everyone has always wondered at the Clintons' marriage, wondering if its one of convenience, or love. I think now love. He really really wanted this for her, believed that she'd be the best. Why should he have to give that up now? Obama would feel the same way if Michelle were in Hillary's position. This really humanizes Bill Clinton for me.

Dare I admit it? I may yet like Bill Clinton again.

Inside Joke

Who is T&A Lady's favorite world leader?

European Commission President Jose Manuel Beeroso.

Lemme tell ya, I was cracking myself up all the way to work with that one.

DARE to Say No (to McCain)

Check out Partnership for a McCain-Free White House. Now I just hope they re-do that "brain on drugs" ad with the eggs.

A Few More Thoughts

And I won't embarrass myself by enumerating them and then forgetting what they all were.

Betty White, f-in hilarious:



The Reverse Bradley effect. I think this could happen. My only evidence, aside from what I read in the blog-o-net, is that my mom and stepdad in Virginia support Obama.* They would admit it to pollsters on the phone, but my mom has described certain perceived pressures in her neighborhood which would make her reluctant to boast a yard sign for Obama. And George Packer has an anecdote in an article in The New Yorker about voters in southern Ohio about a young man he meets (who answers the door in his underwear actually) who admits to being an Obama supporter, and says he knows others, but wouldn't admit it. The young man didn't go on record, either. I can understand this. I remember in high school that taking an unpopular position (like writing "No Blood for Oil" on your backpack during Operation Desert Storm) could illicit actual anger and derision from other 18 year olds. If you didn't have gumption/chutzpah/brass balls, it could be intimidating. But as Norman from The Wire says, "The sanctity of the voting booth is the cornerstone of our democracy." I just hope my fellow Americans get over it, and do the right thing.

* This isn't shocking coming from my mother. I just hope she isn't annoyed that I have broadcast her preference on the inter-tubes. Like Norman from The Wire, my mother would never disclose who she actually voted for, usually saying, "I wrote in Angela Davis" when I asked her who she voted for.


Some minor ways I am noticing that the economy is way f***ed up: My husband has begun to worry; there were only 3 tables occupied tonight at our local spaghetti joint (called Bottle Running by my son because the above poster is on the wall there) when usually the place is jammed; the parking lot in our office has more spots available, leading to conjecture that there was a layoff in the company on the floor above us. Also my 401(k) is down probably 10%, and that's great news. Awesome timing on quitting my job, huh? I don't think that's what they mean when they say "timing the market."

Unless something incredibly hilarious happens at the wedding I am attending, don't expect any posts this weekend. I am flying to Detroit very early tomorrow. I have to go to a party directly from the airport, and (I've never done this before) so I have to dress nicely for the flight. Usually I am either in work clothes or looking like a hot mess, so I am unusually anxious about this. I have no idea why dressing nicely for a long distance flight freaks me out. Maybe because it is something I secretly criticize other people for doing. What is her deal? Why is she dressed like that?, I hiss, in my mind. I'm mean like that.

And no, I am not drinking.

Two Other Thoughts

Where is all the money? I am referring here to the global economic downturn. Was all that "value" just on paper, or are the super-rich hording their money or what?

Oh shit. I can't remember my other thought.

A Lot of Things Rattling Around in My Head

I am maga-busy these days, making it hard to focus on blogging anything more than a few sentences at a time. So I will stick with what I know, and just blog about all the topics that pop into my head.

• McCain wants to suspend the mandatory age for 401(k) withdrawals. Putting aside whether this is a prudent proposal, doesn't it seem like its extremely micro-targeted? The target group being people who are about to turn 70 and a half, of course. How many of those folks were not going to vote for McCain already, who would be swayed by this?
  
• A haiku for the lady I saw in SF today: Lady on the street/where did your eyebrows go to?/Is your forehead cold?
• Ryan Lizza described Obama as a "left conservative", a phrase coined by Norman Mailer, in a New Yorker podcast I heard the other day. Thought that was interesting, and accurate.
• Just as Bill Clinton was considered our 'first Black President', I think Obama will be considered our 'first female President.' He operates in such an empathic, consensus-building mode of leadership that we haven't seen before. It also has a certain poetic justice to it.
  
• My brilliant kid (the older one) asked the other day where helium comes from. I actually had to look it up. A co-worker suggested I say, "From the Party Warehouse", but frankly the Big Bang** is easier to explain.

** All helium in the universe was created in the Big Bang.

An update on Norbert

No, not Norbert the storm. My mother reports: “At Lacordaire during my tenure (9/1964 to 6/1967), Sister Norbert, O.P. was an RN and our school nurse. She wobbled like a weeble and slowly toddled the halls like a three-toed sloth. She was dubbed 'Sister Morbid'.” Mom offers to check Lives of the Saints, if anyone is interested in the origins. I, for one, am interested.

 

That One

I am sure you have heard that McCain called Obama "that one" during the debate last night. Here's what McCain's campaign had to say in reaction to the, well, reactions:

Nicolle Wallace, a spokesman for Mr. McCain, said in a statement: “I am shocked that at a moment of national crisis, where our economy is on the minds of every single person, I am shocked that they are again proving to be the fussiest campaign in American history.”

Shocked at fussiness? Chick needs to chill out. Try being shocked that this war is still going on, that we just set aside $700 billion for companies whose CEOs may not take the money if it means giving up the golden parachute, that people beat children, that the Cubs made it to the playoffs. There's a lot to be shocked about in this world, but "fussiness" does not cut muster. I don't know how these people keep themselves in such high dudgeon. I guess this is what losing looks like. But doesn't all the shock lose its shock value after a while?

Oh, and for the headline alone.

Your Obama Blog of the Day

Yes We Can (Hold Babies). Adorable.

(Giggle)(Head shake)

From Matier and Ross:

And finally: First, the big new Federal Building in San Francisco was late and over budget. Then workers complained about needing sunglasses and umbrellas indoors to shield them from the glaring sun.

Now comes word about another bit of embarrassment at the $144 million "green" behemoth at Seventh and Mission streets.

Officials recently installed four giant, stainless-steel plaques near the entryway in recognition of the many planners, architects and others who helped make the eco-friendly building possible.

Only it wasn't long before office workers were making pilgrimages to the wall - and snickering at the engraved name of one "Hugh G. Rection."

That plaque is now gone. Of course, so are all the others, temporarily - seems they were installed crooked.

More of Nothing

Debate: Tried to watch it. McCain annoys me too much.

Feeling unproductive? This factoid should make you feel worse: rapper Too Short got his start doing "special requests", which are customized rap songs for individuals. At the VH1 Hip Hop Honors, he claimed to have done about 50,000 special requests when he was starting out. 50,000 individualized rap songs. I cannot write one. I can barely write discovery responses these days. Or emails.

There's a hurricane called Norbert? What are the hell?

Last night, I woke up around 2am to get Q some milk. I don't know if it was something else outside or me walking around in the middle of the night (some windows were open) but a skunk sprayed in our backyard. It was awful. I almost cried. The house was totally infused with skunk funk. And that's on top of all the unattractive boy smells that already permeate my life. I was wishing for a desensitized nose, then, my friends, also. Anyway, now I hate skunks, even if they eat snails.

Observations

I was walking around a mall-like location today, and I was listening to these teenagers talking, and all I could think was, "Man, what a waste of words!" It's like, torrential stupidity. Verbal diarrhea. I won't even worry you with the details. Just trust me.

Check out this cool website 30 Reasons. I like it.

I was wondering today, has anyone gotten an Obama tattoo yet? Yes, is the answer. In fact, a lot of people have.

That's all for now.

Tryna Calm Down

Friend sent this to me, don't know where its from. Very helpful, as I am stressing out big time about this election.

(Congrats Red Sox, now back to my regularly scheduled freak-out)

Hecka Funny

Some dudes have devised an Obama Fist Bumps Photo Booth Fundraiser. Click here to see the photos, and you'll understand what I'm talking about.

One other thought: So. Much. White. People.

If you want to feature this awesome photo booth at your fundraiser, let me know. I can hook you up with their erstwhile booking agent.

Get Thee To The Nunnery

Our ol' pal Jay has a piece at the unfortunately named Monkeybicycle.net.

I would go there, Jay, if I were in a study abroad program in Prague.

UPDATE: Jay is no joke. Mr. Scobie reports that he recalls discussing this with Jay at the Old Town Ale House in Chicago in 1992.

VP debate post

Pali did not crap the bed. Sorry for the idiom, mom and mother in law.

This must be the best looking VP debate EVER. Biden is a silver fox. And I know from whence I speak.

UPDATE: Wish I'd seen this before the debate. Thanks Mr. Pat.

UPDATE 2: I just remembered something funny that I heard Hendrick Hertzberg say this morning. He was talking about what he expected from Biden in the debate, and he said that he thought Biden would have all the awkwardness of a happily married man in debating Sarah Palin. He went on to explain (after Dorothy Wickenden [this was in a New Yorker podcast] expressed surprise) that he meant that Biden did not spend a lot of time thinking about how to connect with other women. This is an off-topic point, but that is a really interesting insight into how men understand one another. It might also be a good indicator of whether you have a happily married husband on your hands. In the end, I think Biden did great. He treated Palin like a worthy sparring partner, at least as much as she was McCain's surrogate, and didn't concern himself with understanding her, because, of course, who the hell could?

Various and Sundry

Having little in the way of wit or surplus charm today, herewith is today's blog post:

1. The formal structure of the previous phrasing arises from the fact that I spent this evening writing a, what was it called, First and Final Account and Report and Petition for Final Distribution and For Statutory Compensation. I would say, "Just shoot me" but then some other luckless chap will have to write one for me. It's a probate case.

2. For a good preview of what its like to debate Sarah Palin. I love the phrase "glittering generalities." I think I need to learn to speak in those too.

3. I changed the look of my blog because I was bored with the way it was before. I don't know how to write html so I have to use the blogger templates. A buddy recently recommended typepad (another software "platform" I think is what its called), but I fear change, so I will impotently toggle templates til my brain re-engages with the actual content of this blog, and then the color scheme won't matter again.

He's Everywhere

Western Swing was good enough to bring to my attention the fact that I am not the only Nelson Marans "fan" out there. A DailyKos diarist has run afoul of Mr. Marans, who has accordingly blogged about it. Mr. Marans is clearly out of his league in a foreign policy debate about anything that requires more than skin-deep knowledge of the topic. He doesn't support Obama. He either (a) writes physical letters to periodicals, suggesting he is out of touch with technology, or (b) he is facile with basic technology, like Yahoo Mail, permitting him to email indiscriminately. Those are 3 ways that he resembles the McCain-Palin ticket. Just pointing it out.

Live Blogging the Post-Debate

If I knew what was good for me (and I don't), I would just got to bed. I didn't get to watch the debate live because Li thinks the "Obama show" is boring. In this case, I have to agree. I watched about an hour of it, and maybe because I am basically obsessed with politics, I felt like there was nothing new. First debate, check. On to the bailout.

Having been to Oxford recently, I wonder at a few things. Like where are Howard Dean and Vernon Jordan staying tonight? There aren't a lot of options. I am sort of tickled that they may be staying at the bed and breakfast where I stayed. They'll probably gain 3 pounds at breakfast. Also, there seemed to be football crowd-sized crowds rallying. Is there a game tomorrow?

All right, no interesting insights to see here. Move along.