Still going strong

Long time readers, take heart. Nelson Marans, long a regular object of my affection in this blog, is back and still writing letters to the NY Times. I haven't seen his name since October 25, 2009, when he got a letter published in the magazine but there he is, live and writing in to the Science Times to complain about cheating. This letter is so obscure, boring and scolding, the NYT didn't even publish it online. So I'm retyping it for you here.

What Cheating Says About Us
To the Editor: Re "Cheating's Surprising Thrill" (Oct. 8): Finding a thrill and even satisfaction after cheating is a sad commentary on our present culture. While those my age (nearly 90) would consider cheating close to a criminal act, the practice, now widely prevalent, is almost accepted as normal. It would have been interesting to see the same experiments conducted on people my age. Cheating and the pleasure derived from it mark a generation that has lost its moral anchor.
Nelson Marans
Silver Springs, MD

I'm a little worried that someone has created a Nelson Marans app that allows you to generate a letter-to-the-editor on any topic, because this is almost too spot-on. Glad to have him back, though.

Should I Keep This Up?

National Blogging Month really makes a gal focus on the important things. Like, should I keep blogging? I haven't really felt inclined most days. Plus, I went back to the beginning of this blog, and it was way better then. It used to have silly themes and random stories, and attempted at originality. Barely any of that exists now. Most of my snarky one-off comments have moved over to Facebook and Twitter, or I just keep it to myself because I am too worried that someone I work with will find this blog and it will be a disaster for my career. As I "mature" (and I mean that in a bad way), I worry more and more that this blog might be a platform for some terrible self-destructive revelation that triggers my downfall. Not like I am a big celebrity or anything, but that happened to a guy I tangentially knew, so I am paranoid. Add in the fact that I barely ever read new books, watch new movies* or buy new music - much less stalk the Montgomery Advertiser or Nelson Marans - and there is practically nothing to say.

Here's what I thought I would do. I thought I would do a poll of my various options at this point and let you, the readers, be the judge of this blog's fate. But then I decided that I was too lazy to figure out how to add a poll, so instead, I will just list the options, and you can comment on them. Be aware, if I don't get comments from certain people, I will assume that this blog has lost its core readership, and I may not continue it.

1. Stop blogging; I follow you on Facebook.

2. Stop blogging; I follow you on Twitter.

3. Stop blogging at this website; I will follow you onto a software platform that is easier to post to.

4. Keep blogging here. **

5. If you get fired from this or any future job because of any content or revelations on this blog, I promise to employ you at your last rate of pay ad finitem to continue this blog.

6. Yo no leer en Engles.

* We watched Scott Pilgrim vs. the World last night, and I really liked it. Best line from a tertiary character, "Their first album is so much better than their first album."

** You will need to add some vaguely flattering remarks if you vote for this one, as I am feeling very down on the quality of the blog at this time.

Nelson Marans, Back in the Game

Once a master, always a master. Nelson Marans has a letter in the New York Times Fucking Magazine today. No, I'm not kidding. And possibly for the first time, I agree with him. I tip my hat to you, Mr. Marans. (But I'm too lazy to dig up a link, so if you aren't a subscriber, tough.)

He's Everywhere

Western Swing was good enough to bring to my attention the fact that I am not the only Nelson Marans "fan" out there. A DailyKos diarist has run afoul of Mr. Marans, who has accordingly blogged about it. Mr. Marans is clearly out of his league in a foreign policy debate about anything that requires more than skin-deep knowledge of the topic. He doesn't support Obama. He either (a) writes physical letters to periodicals, suggesting he is out of touch with technology, or (b) he is facile with basic technology, like Yahoo Mail, permitting him to email indiscriminately. Those are 3 ways that he resembles the McCain-Palin ticket. Just pointing it out.

I Direct Your Attention

The first letter in the Science Times is written by the indefatiguable Nelson Marans, God bless him.

Sorry

Once I got in the zone of blogging like every day, I had hoped to keep up the pace. But even I ain't that witty and original. Plus, we were away all weekend. Here are some highlights from my favorite topics:

The Wire: Stressing me out. Why does Omar need to come back if Butchie's dead? I've seen ep 4 so I don't want to write much more because I want to respect my one reader who gives a crap about this and not spoil it for him. Suffice to say, I am having a really hard time buying this season so far. And there's a good S2 cameo in Ep4. Okay, that's enough. No more.

The kids: Hilarious little people. They loved the snow so much in Tahoe that, driving home, Li broke down crying, "I don't want (sob sob) the snow to EVER melt!"

Barack Obama: All my Edwards peeps, please please please breathe deeply of the reality of this campaign and vote for my guy on Feb 5. I love Edwards, too. But he will not get the nomination, and probably won't be a "kingmaker" at the convention either. I was listening to Hillary on the radio today and all I could think of was Betty Loren-Maltese. And let's be frank. No one ever wants to think about BLM. Plus, can you imagine four, much less eight, years of Bill Clinton lounging on the couch of the Oval Office, eating Funions and proffering his opinion on every damn thing? I assume even Hillary would kick him out by March 3, 2009, but who knows? "Two for the price of one" means two equivocating triangulators* for the bloody 2008 election of one. SO, if you were already planning on not voting for Hillary, them I invite you, nay implore you, to not vote for Hillary by voting for Barack. Thank you.

* whatever that means.

Nelson Marans: Don't worry, he's had letters published recently in the Washington Post and The New York Times (and here), opining about such meaningless topics as Amtrak and Barbara Cook: Songbird.

I don't have much else on my mind. Take it easy.

Crazy People Visiting; and, My New Favorite Band

First, I want to welcome Anonymous*, a commenter on Breaking Up Is Hard to Do, who has this to say about my antipathy for my dentist:

Hum....interesting timing for such an angry and hate-filled letter. To go to such length and detail to write such ugly untruths; one might think that the writer (and perhaps interested others) were trying to hurt Dr. McKinzie's reputation?...For those of you seasoned souls who have read about "Andreas" devastating experience, I invite you to reconsider. Trust me, there's more than meets the eye here. I pity those desparate individuals who feel compelled to stoop to this level.

Mr. Marans, is that you?

The other day I heard Somehow at Sea on KALX. I liked them. Check them out. They have a GREAT song called Perfect Game that is inexplicably not on their MySpace page. So call KALX (642-KALX) and ask them to play.

* A different Anonymous, I assume, than the one who accosted me about my AndyRooneyness

Look Who's Back

Well la-ti-da. I was strolling through The Science Times this evening, barely absorbing Natalie Angiers' "poetry", when who should I stumble over in the letters column. You got it. Mr. Marans is ba-ack. Today, Mr. Marans recalls his graduate years, and congratulates himself for not offing his thesis advisor. How Stuart Smalley of him to reward himself for his lack of felonious conduct.

What Brings You to These Parts?

As I told you yesterday, I have the technology at my fingertips to determine where my readers are, and how they found me. I don't actually check all that often but I was prompted to do so by a more careful reader (okay, it was Mr. St. Scobie). Here's a list of google searchs that have brought you to me, my sweets.

1. works that opposed thomas payne's "common sense"
2. joe maguire and ann coulter
3. "pregnant milking FAN" on Polish google. Don't do this search, it delves into realms you don't want to explore. I am NOT kidding about this.
4. "blog's theme" on the Vietnamese google. Huh? Boring City.
5. pix of fireman Here again, I think the searcher was probably hoping for something a little naughtier than I dish up.
6. breakfast in a can and Htoo brothers
7. Nelson Marans is googling himself again. Although this search suggest Marans has a nemesis.
8. union auto plants
9. Amanda Cotten You remember her, don't you?
10. And, saving the best for last, mustache phobias

I am pretty proud of my failure of cohesiveness.

My Vigilance is Rewarded

Nelson Marans is dropping some knowledge on y'all over on the Science Times letters page. Don't think I am not watching, Nelson Marans. I am.

What else is going on with me? Not much. I updated Bay Area Hiking Mamas yesterday. I let someone give my child a buzz cut yesterday. No, wait, I actively encouraged it. It's really freaking cute. Our digital camera is broken, so you'll have to take my word for it.

Ummm....

Due to the wonders of modern technology, I am able to view a list of searches that bring folks to my website. As a result of this, I believe that Nelson Marans googles himself pretty frequently.

But anyway, today a visitor to my blog came via a search for "child birth, whiskey". I just wanted to tell that reader, if he or she should visit again, that while it sounds like a good idea to combine the two, it probably isn't medically advised. Please seek professional help for either your alcoholism or your pregnancy or both. Thanks.

Nelson Marans: Chemist, Writer

In an earlier post, I included a letter published in the NY Times and written by Nelson Marans. It was a good letter. I noted in dicta that Mr. Marans seemed to write to the NY Times a lot. I have not found a letter, published in Today's Chemist at Work, wherein Mr. Marans brags that he has written "nearly 6,000 letters"in his retirement. Damn. While I admit I am impressed, I hope that when I retire, I find a more interesting hobby. Or at least one that takes me outdoors more often. But when I look within myself, I realize that, in all likelihood, I too will spend my golden years writing sharp letters to national and trade publications. Sigh.

Best Comeback of the Day

The other day, my little family visited a private preschool in Berkeley during an open house. It was a lovely school but the focus of the other parents' questions* was how would the school handle their child's brilliance. "What will you do if a child is more advanced than his age? Can he accelerate through the curriculum?" This drove me nuts.

I have not come up with a way of dealing with it, but I like this NYT letter writer's approach to handling people bragging about their children:

To the Editor:
I would suggest as an appropriate response to over-the-top bragging of parents about their child that one should repeat back to them word for word what was said, with the statement prefaced by a comment about how fortunate one is to know the parents of such a gifted child. A similar, but adult, situation occurred when one of my friends touted the fact that he was a friend of a multimillionaire. My response again was simply that I was proud to be the friend of a man who was the friend of a multimillionaire. The bragging stopped immediately.
If you really want to brag about your children, wait 30 years and point out that your child gave you a car or a house, indicating that your offspring was worthy of praise, in the unlikely event that this occurs.
Nelson Marans** Silver Spring, Md., Jan. 5, 2006

*My hubs asked about how they impart values of social justice. When the teacher got into an explanation involving puppets, he then stood up and rushed out as though our child were in crisis. He was not.

** A search for this name on the NYT website shows that he writes into the paper chronically, getting a letter published on average every two months. This makes me question whether he has actually employed this approach. Whatever. I hope I have the nerve to use it someday.