Haven't Got Time for The Pain

Like many Democrats, I have been panicking over the past few days about our election chances, and this panic had an eerie familiarity. I placed it today. It's the pre-2004 Red Sox panic. That's right, Democrats are the new Red Sox. Heading into the 2004 playoffs, the Red Sox hadn't won a World Series in 84 years. They'd come close many times, including 2003. They'd even made it to the World Series in 1986, but were beaten by the Mets. Bucky Frackin' Dent. In the 2004 pennant championship series, the Yankees were up 3 games to 0. No team had ever pulled from that far behind to go on to the World Series, and yet the Red Sox pulled it off, and went on to win the World Series. Their change of luck was confirmed last year when they won the 2007 World Series. Those lovable losers just ain't losers any more.

Democrats are the Red Sox of the 2004 playoffs. We come close to winning, but we never win. Bill Clinton was our 1986 World Series. We made it there and then. . . nothin'. No healthcare reform, the end of welfare. Sure, the economy was good, but there were a lot of complicated reasons for that, and none seems like a victory the Democrats could take credit for. Its like we haven't won a World Series since 1964, and that's a long-ass time ago. But this year, it can still be different. We haven't lost yet, so stop your bitchin', steal second base, and get this series back on track. We are going to win. John McCain Sucks!

And another thing: my grandfather passed away* and my sister and I are traveling to Albany NY this week. This will either put a crimp in my blogging or I will be dispatching regularly from my blackberry about my ventures. We shall see. I just downloaded Spore to my ipod, so the former is more likely. I can already tell that it is extremely addictive, even if the wheel makes it a little hard to play.

* I appreciate your condolences in advance. He was very old (91) and very ill. Both his life and his passing were a blessing to him, I think. Its looking increasingly likely that both Mr. Scob and I will live to be almost 200 years, based on the longetivity and health of our grandparents.

Things You Can Do To Help

Just to loop back to my recent panic attack about Obama, I wanted to let you know about some more opportunities you have to help out.

Steve-A-Rino has this call to arms at his blog Glossaria. Well, not actually arms, of course, but he has a great idea for a quick fundraiser to put a Planned Parenthood ad on the air to rebut the McCain nonsense about Obama's support for education for children on understanding "bad touching".



Another thing you can do: Come with me to Nevada for the election! I will be traveling with about 80 other attorneys to Vegas or Reno to monitor polls during voting. Lemme know. Come on! Party on, Dude! Wheeee-ew! Coyote Ugly! It'll rock!

My laziest blog post ever

I am blogging from my mobile device so I can blog lying down. So sue me.

This morning at the gym I watched a little of the Today show and they played a clip of McCain making the lipstick-on-a-pig joke about Hillary Clinton some months back. I sort of thought that would put an end to this bullshit narrative but no such luck. I haven't seen or heard of the clip again. The thrall the media has with its manufactured crises prevents actual news, or even proof of non-news from getting out.

On the other hand, they also had a reunion of the cast from Airplane. Plus Ann Curry is still hot after all these years. So Today Show: thumbs up. The rest: thumbs down.

Your Bush Presidency at Work

Usually a news article puts its juiciest stuff right up front, but this article in the New York Times, Wide-Ranging Ethics Scandal Emerges at Interior Dept., is juicy the whole way through. Its so salacious that a Hollywood producer might even feel uncomfortable making it into a movie. Or would reject it as too over-the-top and unrealistic.

I think this is just one illustration of the extent to which the Bush Presidency is the Oligarchy of Big Oil and nothing more.

In Other Political News

My cousin Tom Costello won his primary yesterday to become the Democratic Party candidate for Lt. Governor of Vermont. He faces the incumbent Brian Dubie, a Republican, in the November election. Congratulations to Tom and Good Luck in November.

Time to Get on the Stick

Unlike my Wire obsession, I am not even going to be meek and apologetic about this. There are eight weeks left to this election season. At the end of it, lots of people will vote. Think for a second what it would be like to have John McCain as President. It makes you shudder, doesn't it? It freaks the SHIT out of me.

I spent the whole day in Nevada today, meeting with the Obama campaign about voter protection efforts, and I am really freaked out that we are going to lose this election. Not because of what I saw of the Obama campaign today, but because of who I didn't see, and what I didn't see. I didn't see any bumper stickers, or signs. I did see lots of problems and misinformation on the voter election website, and too much stuff to do and not enough people to do it all.

Here's what I did see: Road signs for a guy running for Congress whose platform is: Win the War, Flat Taxes, Secure Our Borders. Query why he feels that Nevada needs its borders secure from its neighbors (it doesn't touch Mexico) but he clearly knows he'll get traction with that. And if the Republicans get traction, that's the sort of horseshit we'll be seeing proposed as "policy".

SO: What are you going to do about it? Everyone has to do something. Especially those of you who live in Virginia, ahem, where you could make a huge difference. Here are some suggestions:

1. Donate money.
2. Get a bumper sticker or lawn sign.
3. Volunteer to call your neighbors.
4. Host a party.
Its very easy to do these last two by signing up with www.my.barackobama.com. You can find events and volunteer opportunities in minutes. VERY EASY.

Not comfortable with the outright campaigning? How about being a pollworker in your county? Call your county election department or registrar of voters and volunteer to work at a poll in your neighborhood. Its very important this year to have people working who are facilitating a full vote. There will be lots of new voters, especially around places like, say, William & Mary, just for instance, who could use a supportive pollworker rather than a blue hair who tries to shoo them away.

Sorry to be so extremely earnest about this but I am wicked stressed out about this election. Its more important than donating to any charity right now, more important than fixing your leaky faucet or changing your light bulbs to CFL. I will even give you a personal dispensation on not recycling this week if you go do something for this campaign. Thank you. Back to our regularly scheduled snarky program when we return.

Friday Morning Wake-Up Call

I Said I Would Blog About It, So. . .

I promised last week that I would blog about my job. In fact, what I will blog about is that I am leaving my job. Tuesday was my 8-year anniversary at my job, and I am ready to do something different. Not sure what, and I am open to ideas. Very open. I am thinking about political stuff, since I loved the campaign, or non-profit work, since it feels simpatico (good work, slightly dysfunctional). I have stayed at my job longer than I wanted to out of loyalty to my co-workers, whom I love and respect tremendously, and my clients, whom I respect and feel that I serve very well. But loyalty doesn't get you all the way to retirement anymore.

One thing that has been mentioned a couple of times is that I should just blog full-time. I don't think I am suited for it, and frankly, I only have about 40 regular readers. But purely out of curiosity, would you, my readers, accept efforts on my behalf to do this blog thing more economically?

My Impressions

I got to watch a tad of the Palin speech and here are my impressions:

1. Levi Johnston is living the American male nightmare. Imagine: You're 17 again. You get your Christian girlfriend pregnant. Her mom is nominated for the Vice Presidency. Suddenly, you're getting married, your mySpace page has been yanked, and you are on the stage of the Republican National Convention, naked. And chewing gum. You wake screaming.

Even I have had this nightmare.

2. If she were a Democrat, I would love her. Okay, wait, I would still be a little wierded out by the parading of pregnant daughter, but I would be forgiving, and own it the way the Repubs have, because being pro-choice means being pro-choice, so when a young woman decides to keep her baby, I want that baby to be born into the best and most loving world we can provide for it. So I support Bristol's choice, if she had one. And Sarah Palin, if she were a Democrat, would rock. From the sass to the incredibly cute baby, she'd be my hero.

But she ain't. Her politics blow chunks. She's vindicative, she's a book burner. She's a secessionist, she's the CEO of America's welfare queen. BUT. . . .

She's a great politician. This was a great decision on her part, to accept the VP nomination, warts and all. Here's her brilliant gamble: If she and McCain win, she's Vice President of the United States of America. A-Number One candidate in 2012 or 2016, depending on when McCain bows out. If they lose, she's the right-wing poster girl. She goes back to AK to serve out her relatively easy (compared to VP) job, and she's the beautiful, funny, sweet, bright voice of the Right. And in 2016, she's the standard bearer. Trig will be 9, Track will be Colonel Palin, and the girls will be grown up enough to campaign for her. She will be a shoo-in. 8 weeks of media scrutiny is worth it for that kind of power.

Gross

Sorry, sent from my phone. Click below. Not so gross that you'll barf or anything, but gross.

http://news.yahoo.com/nphotos/Most-Emailed-Photos-last-wish-El-Nuevo-Dia-dead-on/ss/1756/im:/080819/481/e4342933128e4f7c9d8e0ab6e2c2e871/

Celebrity Look-alike: Sarah Palin Edition

TMZ has a really funny slide show of Sarah Palin celebrity look-alikes. Enjoy! And thanks M.

Two Americas

Hi and welcome to a reader who showed up on my doorstep tonight (not in a creepy way). My kids didn't go to bed til 9:40 so I couldn't hack going back out for a beer. But feel free to comment now. You all can. And did you know you can get my blog on an RSS feed? I barely know what that is and I certainly don't know how you can set it up.

Okay, to the topic at hand. Listening to the reaction from the press and my friends about the Palin pick, it strikes me that Barack Obama was wrong. There are two Americas. Both happen to be reeling with joy at the choice of Sarah Palin for VP. On one hand, you have the rightwingers, aka "The Base", who are over the moon that there's a 100% completely anti-choice creationist a heartbeat from being Leader of the Free World. On the other, there are the rest of us, who can't believe our good luck that such a 100% complete babe-in-the-woods (and no, TK, I don't mean that in a double entendre way) would be picked. These are the folks who, like me, assume that no one wants to vote for someone whose tenure as PTA president is her foreign policy background (because I am sure the Wasilla Warriors played the Whitehorse Horsemen in the All-Americas Hockey Finals in 2002). And neither side has even the slightest clue what the other side is talking about.

Battlestar Galactic Fans Untie

I've already received the email with the pics of John McCain looking like Colonel Tigh and Sarah Palin compared to Laura Roslin. But why not the equally obvious Cindy McCain-Ellen Tigh comparison?

Overheard

Four kids at McDonald's:
"How long you been out for Obama?"
"For like 11 yars" (that's not a spelling error)
"What? You only like 23!"

Ya Gotta Admit It

Things are moving towards me being right. While this teen pregnancy won't sink Palin, the fringe-nut secessionist party stuff sure doesn't help. Palin, of course, won't apologize when she bows out; she'll just say she doesn't want to be a distraction to the real issues in this important election year, or some bulls***. And then Romney? Because you know Colin Powell has said no.

Other reactions to today's news:

LC: Bristol is a slang term for breasts in England.
AD: If Sarah Palin knew she was going to keep the baby, why'd she have amnio to discover he had Down's?
AG: [stepfather] said the 17 year-old was a wild one. Ha!

Me: How do you have FIVE children and neglect to inform any of them, but especially the older ones, how babies are made? Or does Palin still not know herself? Forget the abortion question. She's consistent on that. But silence on the basic plumbing is a problem. Think how ignorant she'll want everyone else's kids to be.

Oh, well. We won't have Sarah Palin to kick around much longer.

I don't think Palin is in my celebrity look-alike chain of likeness. She's on the other side of Fey from me.

Sarah Palin = Harriet Miers

It's pronounced Pay-lin, by the way. Also, Nevada is pronounced Nev-aah-da, not Nev-ahh-da. It rhymes with cat or vat. I had to be told that recently, as I am inexplicably the AFL-CIO Voter Protection Coordinator for Nev-aah-dah.

Back to bizness: My theory about the Palin pick is that it just demonstrates what low regard for the vice presidency McCain has, and how little he understands the office. While its true that it has been traditionally under-utilized, one cannot argue that Cheney leaves it a ceremonial position. McCain should know that, but doesn't. Instead, he has joked that the VP attends funerals and checks up on the health of the POTUS every day. Palin has an equally dim view of the job, asking What does the VP even do, anyway?

I've been wondering whether I should feel bad for criticizing Palin for going back to work 3 days after her son was born. In my heart, I think its a terrible thing to do to a child, and to do to one's self. Take a freakin' break, lady, you just had a baby. Even the easy ones are tough for the first week or two, for godsake. But maybe, my feminist demon-on-the-shoulder says, some women don't want to be home with their baby, and believe that whoever is home - dad, gramma, auntie, nanny - is a more caring option. And in those cases, it's probably true. If you don't want to be home with your child, then its good when you leave that child with someone you trust to love him. I feel that. But do Republicans? Does Anne Coulter? It's just bizarre to me.

Here's a theory I had briefly considered: Palin is not expected to last as the VP nominee. (I also wonder if there's a mechanism in the RNC by-laws to refuse to accept the nominee's VP pick). To quote rwallnerny:

What if next Tuesday or Wednesday, after Palin gets beat up by the press a bit (which they will, the press *hates* candidates being put up for national office which they haven't brutally vetted first), she comes out to the podium and tearfully "announces" that she is declining the nomination for vp to spend more time with her five month old baby. McCain accepts her resignation the ticket, says he was proud to have picked a woman, and then picks Romney as her replacement.

The reason he'd do this, is to steal the spotlight from Obama after The Speech but still get the actually presidential-ish Romney on the ticket.

Come on. Every long weekend needs a conspiracy theory.

And even if it wasn't planned that way, it might work out that way. Palin may shape up to be the next Harriet Miers.

UPDATE: The reason I didn't do a straightforward compare and contrast on these two is that they are actually polar opposites. Harriet Miers had decades of service to Republicans but was viewed as suspect and insufficiently doctrinaire. Palin has like 10 minutes of public service as a throw-the-bums-out Repub and she's a darling of the grassroots because she didn't abort a baby with Down's. Huh? While its true Harriet Miers didn't have the chops to be a Supreme Court justice, she's certainly better qualified than Palin to be the VP. So I am hereby starting a Facebook group: Harriet Miers for Vice Presidential Nominee.

We're In The Money

Well, probably not me and mine.

Calculate your Obama tax cut.

what the ...?

Did you know that Sarah Palin’s kids are named Bristol, Piper, Track, Trig, and Willow? And that she went back to work three days after her baby was born in April? And that he was born with Down’s Syndrome? Is her vagina made of steel? Or is her heart made of stone?

My favorite part about the Democrats’ glee is that the fact that they are calling her Geraldine Quayle.

What Does McCain Believe?

And I don't mean that in the flip-flop sense that everyone's been asking. Reading this interview he did with Time magazine certainly leaves me with the impression that McCain believes . . . he's going to lose.

Another Promise

On to my next topic. The babe dad. What's that you ask? First of all, its Mr. Scobie. Yeah yeah yeah. This isn't a love post about him. Its a post about the fact that all the dads on the block have started exercising. The central activity is Monday night basketball. Pretty much all of them go as often as they can. Which is cool. But recently, they've each individually started working out. Not all of them. But Mr. Scobie is running regularly with another dad from up the street, who has lost weight. Another dad has been doing boot camp for 2 months and has lost some weight. That's 43% of the dads! And another one already worked out regularly. They are shaping up to be an in-shape crew.

So what's really going on on Monday nights? My hubs comes back from "the gym" pretty sweaty but there's more than one way to make a guy sweat. I briefly considered that there was a collaborative effort to conceal numerous affairs, but frankly that doesn't seem like its this crew's style. That leaves two other plausible explanations (I mean, they can't all be gay, right?): They want to look good for their wives, or they want to look good for eachother, on the basketball court. As pleased as all the wives surely are, I think the latter explanation is the more likely.

And here's the conundrum: The wives have no similar incentive to start working out for eachother. Which leaves us with the incentive of working out for ourselves or for our husbands. And since our husbands are working out for eachother, that won't get us out of bed at 5:45 to go running.

I Am A Promise Keeper

But not in a creepy way. I am just returning to blog posts long promised, that's all.

While we were on vacation at the loveliest beach house I've ever been allowed to enter, I actually got to read a couple of books. I read Gang Leader for A Day by Sudhir Venkatesh and I read Rammer Jammer Yellow Hammer, by Warren St. John. Good books both but I preferred Rammer Jammer. Which is hard to admit, since its about a topic I hate nearly more than any other: college football. It's not quite as good as Moneyball, which actually caused me to become a baseball fan, but it made me a fan of fans. At least Bama fans. But maybe I was already a fan of those folks.

Gang Leader, on the other hand, did not make me a fan of sociologists. I had hoped it would be a Wire-esque expose of leadership of a drug organization, but it was really more about the central conflict of sociology. Should it be more centered on statistics and scientific methods, which are very poor at capturing "true" or "real" stories of people (in this case poor people), or should it rely on ethnography, where the sociologist "lives among" his subjects to fully appreciate their way of life?

The biggest problem, made very clear by this book, is the so-called Heiseberg principle effect on the research. Venkatesh is aware of the problem. He relates several instances where his subject misuse him, sometimes while simultaneously warning him that he might be used, and the uncertainty that introduces into his research. But he relates it all in this faux naif voice, as though it never occurred to him that the problems he encounters or witnesses existed. To paraphrase (and mock) one particular example, he'd say something like, "What did I know? I was just a middle class Indian kid from Southern California. I didn't realize ghettos were considered dangerous." In an effort to avoid sounding like an academic (he teaches at Columbia), he comes across like Gomer Pyle.

Good Stuff

A new blog for the list to our right: Cake Wrecks. Freakin' awesome.

Completely Random

When I get old, I promise I will not wear:

1. Red hats
2. Anything purple
3. drawstring pants, except to bed
4. asymmetrical earrings

Imagine yourself in a Maoist Propaganda Poster.

Which brings me to a promised topic: Tom Frank's The Wrecking Crew. I will admit that I have not finished this book, but I have read enough to get the flavor. Its an incredibly well-researched book, and it well makes the case (to this already persuaded reader), that conservatives have set out to destroy government and line their pockets while doing it. Definitely worth a read if you have let your blood pressure settle to a healthy level and find that unacceptable.

Mr. Scobie and I had the pleasure of seeing Tom at a dinner hosted by a local bookstore, where he gave a great summary of the book. Once I started the book, I felt like I were listening to Tom, but without the levity of his personal charm. That makes the book slightly disappointing- not in its subject matter, but in the inherent charmlessness of the polemic form. Anyway, it was good to see Tom, and he in particular noted that he thought JFB was a great guy, and was happy to hear we still see him. At one point in the distant past, JFB declared, "Tom Frank wouldn't last a second in sixth century China. The Tang dynasty would kick his ass." Technically, the Sui dynasty ruled China in the sixth century, but JFB was drunk, and so Tommy has long since forgiven him. Tom probably would have been fine during the Sui dynasty, right?

UPDATE: Tom has a good column in the Wall Street Journal today.

Home Run

Michelle Obama knocks it out of the park:

Back From Vacation

And I have a lot to blog about. But a melange of not-quite-alcoholic-enough beverages leaves me verbose enough to blog but not enough to say anything. So I will do a 5-words-or-less summary of my major topics:

1. Vacation: Hella relaxing.
2. Joe Biden: Good choice, you'll see.
3. Denver convention: What's to protest?
4. Georgia: Cold War Deux, I'm psyched.
5. Weight Gain: Not cool.
6. Exercise: Also not cool.

Topics about which I will blog more this week:
1. Tom Frank and The Wrecking Crew
2. Obama and the drug war
3. My job
4. Books I have read
5. The conundrum of the "babe dad"

Summer's almost over, folks. I think it says in Ecclesiastes that there's a time to sow, a time to reap and a time for the fields to lay fallow. If its not in the Bible, it should be. Well, the fallow time is behind us, and its time to either reap or sow, depending on how you construe this metaphor, blog-wise. Readers, read. Bloggers, blog. That's the way nature intends it.

Celebrity Look-alike 1.5

"Anonymous", a neighbor of mine, reminded me, as he borrowed our weed whacker, that he has occasionally compared me to Tina Fey. I would slot her in between Rossellini and Evangelista, although she's probably the most accurate celebrity comparison. So accurate that I can't even think of anything funny to say about it.

Celebrity Look-alike 2.5

From Kate: "I just stopped by St Scobie's Outpost and I cannot believe that Ralph Macchio is not on that list. You were 12, you wore red & black exclusively, you had short hair, the movie was huge. I remember noticing this resemblance and soon after someone remarking about it to you, and you said, 'Cool'."

'Tis true, except my buffalo check days were around age 10. So, hovering around Albert on my celebrity likeness meter is Daniel-sen. That's totally me.

More Celebre-Me

I have a Kevin Bacon rating of 3. What's yours? Check with the Oracle of Bacon. You enter someone who you personally know that's even minimally famous, and it hooks you up. I did Ira Glass (former employer) and David Grohl (he was once in my kitchen at the Schloss*), and they are each only 2 degrees of separation from Kevin Bacon.

* The Schloss is actually called the Plutoschloss, and I had a very involved dream about it last night. For my non-Hyde Park readers, the Schloss was the house I lived in with the Rocker and the Day Trader, and from where my undies disappeared and re-appeared behind the toilet. Remember that story? Anyway. I can't really remember the dream well enough. Plus who really wants this to be a Dream Blog? Not me, for one.

While We Are On the Topic of Celebrities

I saw a picture today of a comedian I really used to like, and remembered that I was once likened to him. That got me thinking about other celebrities I have been compared to. From best to worst:

1. Isabella Rossellini: In the dark days of my pre-teen years, when I self-destructively wore a side-tail and many many grotty friendship bracelets, an old friend of my mother's told me that I looked like Rossellini. It was intended to make me feel better about myself at a time when that was impossible. It did help in the long run, I think. At the time, it didn't work to improve my self-esteem, but I think it shortened the time it took over all for me to eventually develop better self-esteem. If that makes any sense.

2. Linda Evangelista: A girl in my high school class kept pictures of models on her locker door, and one day, she yelled out to me, "Hey, you look like her. At least, your nose does." She was pointing at a picture of Evangelista. Having developed some self-esteem by that point, I decided to take this as a compliment, and not the wierd dig at my nose she probably intended.

3. Albert from Little House on the Prairie: Certain people who will recognize themselves without me having to describe them once told me that I looked like Albert from Little House. My healthy self-esteem has decided to say that this was solely because of the haircut Albert and I shared, and I would prefer that no one disabuse me of this notion.

4. Emo Phillips: There was another girl I went to high school with who was in a school play at our "brother school". When my boyfriend at the time told her that he and I were dating (or whatever), she said, "You mean the girl that looks like Emo Phillips?" The boyfriend, sort of to his credit, I guess, said, "I think Emo Phillips is hot." He also told me that he saw her changing in dress rehearsal and that her nipples were as big as pancakes. So now you have that image in your head too.

100 points to Paris

See you at the debate, bitches.

See more Paris Hilton videos at Funny or Die

Gobama!

First there was will.i.am, then Ludicris, now Big Boi and Mary J:

The Reach of Nelson Marans

Blogging on my Q from the dentist office's waiting room a few weeks ago, People did a story on couples who have sex every day to improve their marriage. Our old pal Nelson weighs in: "When is there time for meaningful conversation and other requirements of a proper relationship?"
Oh, Nelson.
The couple responds: "It's not like we were locked in a bedroom 24 hours a day!"

Cousin News

I want you to know that my family members are not just famous for their art and dance, they are also entrepreneurs and politicians.

My cousin Malachy has started a T-shirt company. I will add a link when I can find it again.

My mom's cousin Tom is running for Lieutenant Governor of Vermont.

Robert Novak Admits He's a Tool.

Finally, Tool.

More Awesome Then Even The Obama Video

Woman runs sword into foot during Wiccan ritual.

Souuuuth Side!

Thanks to JZ for passing along the link to this video. Watch about a minute into this Obama video to here him represent!!

Totally totally awesome.

A Backward-Looking Futurist

I've been kicking around some new career ideas lately, and a new one dawned on me. I think I should be a futurist. How does one go about becoming a Futurist? Actually, I don't care. Because I can plausibly guarantee you that my Futurist career is not going to extend beyond this blog post. But no matter.

Here's what I know about Futurism: (1) They have names like Alvin and Newt; (2) they think human remains should be shot into space rather than being buried here (my dad believes this, I think); (3) they think the Dow will hit 36,000 by the year 2007.

With that trusty data under my belt, I'd like to pitch my Futurism paradigm on you. But first we need to travel back in time, to 1989. I was a high sophomore, and my religion teacher was Sister Peggy. Sister Peggy was wise in many ways. Her prior gig had been as a chaplain at Rutgers and she admitted to keeping condoms in her sweater pockets to give to undergrads. This shocked the shit out of me in high school, but that's not the point of this story. Sister Peggy once said something along the lines of "In order for the Third World to become Second World, to First World must also become Second World." Her view of Christ ran along the same lines - that he didn't call on us to all become poverty-stricken beggars swearing off the pleasures of capitalism (or whatever gives us our pleasure), just that we all had to strive for some kind of equitable middle class for everyone. Her theories on this have knocked around in my head all these years, and I agree with them.

My Futurist theory is that Sister Peggy could be right, and that we could all gravitate towards a more equitable middle ground. And I think that the global climate crisis will facilitate it. I have read two articles in the past week about European towns who have shifted the use of their energy. Add it to Al Gore's challenge. Let me be totally pie-in-the-sky optimistic here and argue that, if we achieve this weaning, it could have dramatically positive effects on the economies of underdeveloped countries (in addition to the global benefits) because they can skip the nasty coal-burning industrial revolutions and move directly to cleaner, cheaper, more renewable resources. Jobs will be created, standards of living raised. While we in the US are powering down our voracious consumption, others can join the grid.

I recognize that I have some very cynical readers out there. And that its a stretch to convince y'all that going green is god's work, so I will lay off now. Plus, I have run out of Futuristic ideas for the moment.

Nana Shows How Its Done

If you read the comment to the prior post, you are probably worried that I might be in a whole heap of trouble with my mother-in-law. And I may be. But Nana's post points out exactly what's wrong with the Boomers in "Just Don't Call Me Granny". Most important difference: Nana is unashamed of being a grandmother, and she's a good one. She happens to go to hear bands on Saturday nights not because she is trying to capture her youth but because, well, she likes music, dancing and doesn't need to be in bed by 10 p.m. the way I do. Nana is NOT the problem.

Its not engaging in youthful activities that is annoying about Boomers, its when they pretend they have a monopoly on youth that is annoying. Another operative piece of Nana's comment is the fact that she works. Nana also owns property, makes prudent financial plans, and looks out for her offspring in very clearheaded ways. I.e., she's an adult. She doesn't smoke pot with her kids or divulge the details of her sex life. Thank God. But since my teen years, I have known parents who do those things, failing to understand the boundaries between their own youthful experiences and their children's lives. I can 100% guarantee you that our parents did not have friends who got high with their parents. Boundaries, people.

And now that we are older, they are also refusing to cede territory in the workplace and in politics. This was a bigger problem I had with Hillary and Bill than many other things. They could not grasp that they were not the Hot New Thing, and their sense of entitlement was totally galling. Anyway, that's just one example. As I said yesterday, I can't really pull all the strings together. But don't worry Nana, or Mom, you are NOT the problem. Actually, you might be the solution.

Trying to Get My Temper Under Control

There is one screed, one complaint, one rant, that I have in me that is so vitriolic that I dare not blog about it. It concerns the Babies of the Boom. Oh, how they annoy me. Not any one in particular, but the whole damn lot of them. Every few days, some toss-off article praises their adorable habits or condemns their voracious hunger for public welfare and my blood boils up. I try to formulate a pithy post that brings all my disparate responses together, and I can't. Its a strange area of writer's block. So instead, I will just present these items without comment, and maybe over time, you can see what my problem is.

Just Don't Call Me 'Granny'

And credit to the Oakland City Attorney John Russo (Thanks to A Better Oakland):

Baby Boom politicians have done a uniquely bad job of bringing along new talent. And there are a lot of theories around that. Is it because the Baby Boom generation, having grown up self-identified as the youth generation, cannot conceive outside of itself being the youthfulness, and therefore, doesn’t think of itself in a role as sort of wiser, older, mentoring younger people along and prefers to point the finger at younger people?

This quote is seemingly unrelated to the article above, but then again, it isn't. The refusal of some in the Baby Boomer generation to acknowledge their own aging (and subsequent inability to grow up) has an impact in many aspects of our lives, and we are grappling with that fallout on a daily basis on a national level and even on personal levels, when more senior employees refuse to share wisdom and cede responsibility to younger people, for example.

Awright, so I said I wouldn't comment. But I will return to this topic.

Banal Points, volume 254

Frank Sinatra:Mrs. Robinson::William Shatner:Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds

No, seriously.

Sometimes I Hate the Bay Area

I was feeling so warm and fuzzy about the SF Firefighter, that when I saw the headline Newcomer sitting in a tree near Berkeley protest, I actually dared hope that the newcomer was a California condor, or at least a turkey vulture. But no, of course not.

And then, I got this comment on my old post about my former dentist:

anonymous said
What mean comments to say about a good dentist, Mr. Mckinzie.
One might think a certian person is angry because of all the lies.
Dr. Mckinzie is the best, his office staff is extremely nice, and attend to your every need.
I could not ask for a better dentist than Dr. Mckinzie patient.

It made me chuckle. Glad to know he's out there, trolling my blog.

Sometimes I Love the Bay Area

My glee at this takes me surprise. A San Francisco firefighter was snapped riding topless with Dykes on Bikes during Pride and it seems she might have been wearing her badge (a no-no) on her corset. This is the sort of thing that I would assume my reaction would be to be very annoyed, and scoff at the silliness of SF. Instead, I think its sort of awesome. I particularly love that the firefighter union president took it all in stride.

We were able to contact fire union boss John Hanley - up on the fire line in Butte County - who told us that while he hadn't seen the photos, "I'm sure it wasn't a Fire Department badge."

Just roll with it, baby. Since this is ostensibly a family blog (ha!), you can click here for a photo.

Truly Random Thoughts

Today's Most Unsettling Headline: Mukasey Pledges Vigilance on Elections. The dude is a scary Skeletor (okay, so its not exactly Separated At Birth) and the word "vigilance", in the wake of Mugabe's recent "get out the vote efforts", is not what you want to hear from one of Bush's henchmen.

In other news, I have nothing else to report in the way of random thoughts. What's on my mind lately is not random at all. In In increasing order of time spent thinking about each topic, I am preoccupied with:
1. what I should blog about;
2. my car;
3. the Presidential election;
4. my budget;
5. why we have no beer in the house other than Miller High Life and should I have a scotch instead?;
6. my job.

I have these things to say about these topics, respectively:
1. It's evident from this post that I have nothing to blog about.
2. My car is fine now.
3. I really don't have a big problem with Barack Obama's faith-based initiative stuff, and I will explain later why this is, and its not just because I am big sucka for everything BO does and says.
4. It continues to require my participation on the "income" side. As long as that happens, there is nothing to worry about.
5. It's left over from the NASCAR trip, and we ran out of drinkable beer, so yes, probably.
6. It breaks a rule of mine to blog about this topic.

Let me elaborate:
1. Yes, I do.

2. There's a pump that pumps coolant to the hybrid battery and it broke, but they replaced it so now the car won't think its overheating unless it actually is.

3. Obama's faith-based initiatives are not rooted, unlike Bush's, in a desire to end government and spread Christianity. I think he has very explicitly described why his plans do not infringe on separation of church and state, and I think he will be good about enforcing that (dare I say, he'll be vigilant?). The Saul Alinsky model of community organizing encourages the organizer to make coalitions with all willing allies, even if it's just issue-based. In Chicago, churches, mosques and synagogues play a prominent role in alliances for political change, social justice and social services. Obama's ideas grow out of that tradition, not out of the missionary tradition of the evangelical church that Bush paid lip service to. An important component of Obama's program is not that its faith-based, but that it wants to support community organizations. This leads to. . .

My second reason for being interested in his approach - and I will be referring to The Wire in a moment - is that the existing frameworks for delivering services and making social change either don't work anymore or never worked. In The Wire, Bunny Colvin helps implement this school-within-a-school at Tilghman Middle School, where they take the worst kids out of the classes and give them intensive instruction. It helps the wild kids and it helps the other kids to have the disruptive children out of the classroom. But when Bunny and the professor plan to go to the mayor to pitch it on a broader scale, they get shot down by the school district woman and left out in the cold by the mayor's staff, who file their report in the circular file cabinet. If small projects work, why not fund them and let them work? We don't need to make them national. They don't need to be made into their own bureaucracy. Just fund them and see how far they can get on their own steam. Contrast Bunny's project with the No Child Left Behind/teach to the test model implemented in the rest of Tilghman and you will see where the real progress happened. To be corny about it, maybe we don't need a social security blanket, we need a social security patchwork quilt.

6. Knight of Nothing recently asked, "Why do bloggers abandon a post?" It's a good question. (He also inspired me to write the above on Obama). In response, I articulated some rules I have about this blog:

The main reason I abandon a piece is that I have written something that violates a rule of mine, and I can't figure out how to say what I want to say without violating the rule. The rules are things like, speaking ill of someone who can be identified to others, talking about work, talking about my husband or kids in too much detail (so that they could be identified to a casual reader). I also abandon when I have forgotten my point or am failing to make one.

As you can see from the present post, I don't always abandon a post when I tread on a rule. Arguably, this post has violated nearly every rule I have, especially that last one.

Baffling Spam

At work, we have a spam filter on so I don’t have to see much spam. It’s very effective, so every few days I log on to make sure it hasn’t caught a personal email from a friend who for some reason might have sent me an email about Nigeria, Viagra, watches and stock tips. There’s usually nothing there. But lately there have been a lot of emails which have the subject “you look really stupid” or “what a stupid face you have here”. I have to admit, its pretty effective. I am dying to open one of these emails to see what it could possibly be about. So far, I have held off but if the taunting continues, I don’t know how long I will be able to hold out.

Update: Now all the spam is saying "alaiacon is a moron". How galling is that!?

Worth Mentioning

Bush has appointed the first female 4-star general, which I think is interesting. Since I went on a tirade last week about how I don't think it makes a big difference when women are in positions of high authority, I am not going to go all ga-ga, but I do think its worth mentioning as sort of cool.

This is totally unrelated: Has anyone else seen the new Cool Whip in a can commercial? It is virtually indistinguishable from a KY ad. They are straight pitching it as a sex aid. I guess its cool that they are exploiting its full market potential, but it sort of turns my stomach too.

In Case You Are Wondering

It would be rough on my family, with the rigors of the campaign and the possibility of moving to DC, but I am also willing to be Obama's VP, if asked.

Just When You Thought It Was Safe to Venture Near

Sometimes B will call on his way home from work and say, "How are the kids?" and I will say either, "They are great," or "The monkeys are flinging their poo." That makes the kids laugh hysterically and Q will say "poo" over and over again.

But I'm kidding when I say that. My children know better than to use their feces as a projectile. And - we've worked on this - biting isn't allowed either. But its uh-mazing the number of Trustafarian parents who don't teach their children these lessons. So then you have these problems:

BERKELEY — After tree sitters hurled buckets of human excrement at arborists who cut traverse lines and removed wooden platforms Tuesday, the raucous day came to a head when a tree sitter bit an arborist so hard he was sent to the hospital with an arm wound.

The biter goes by the name Millipede. This is unusual. According to experts at Texas A&M:

Millipedes do not bite; but when disturbed they can produce an irritating fluid (using repugnatorial glands opening at the base of the legs). This fluid can irritate eyes, blister the skin, produce an unpleasant odor and cause allergic reactions in venom sensitive people. Some species can squirt their fluids several inches.

That sounds about right. Enjoy lock-up, Millipede.

Summer of Love

I want to commemorate the momentous occasion of legal marriage for all that has arrived in California today by saying that not only does gay marriage not erode my own straight marriage, but it makes it stronger. I far prefer being part of an institution that is equal and non-discriminatory and my marriage is a better one because now more people can share and enjoy its gifts and responsibilities.

And in that vein, I hope y'all caught the Onion-esque article in the Times the other day: Gay Couples Find Marriage Is A Mixed Bag. Talk about articles that write themselves. I hope they follow it up with "Straight Couples Find Marriage Is A Salmagundi."

Some Final Notes on the Campaign, National Edition

Sami asks an intriguing question in a comment below. He asks whether any of these women exist, these women who purportedly will not vote for Obama because he beat Hillary and because of the sexism of the campaign, but will rather vote for McCain. Frank Rich argued in his column yesterday that these women do not exist. Or rather, that the Democrats need not fear that, by November, these women will not have come around. And I think he's right. The women who are fiercely loyal to Clinton are also fiercely loyal to reproductive rights, and feel strongly against the war and for the environment. So at the end of the day, they will vote for Obama or stay home. The stay-at-homes may, in the end, be a small enough part of the liberal base not to affect the election.

However, they are a very vocal minority. Today's example is the "outrage" over Obama hiring Patti Solis Doyle. The WaPo reports Clinton insiders feel "shock" and "a slap in the face" over this move, supposedly intended to signal that he will definitely not be considering Clinton for the veep slot. Last week, the NYT reported that Clinton donors are waiting-and-seeing, for I don't know what. (one commentator pointed out that as soon as the big donors realize that their precious dreamed-of ambassadorships are slipping way if they don't step up, they will get on board).

What do these things mean? It means that there is a group of Hillary supporters who cannot shake their sense of entitlement about Clinton's candidacy, and feel the need to vent it publicly in a way that can only be described, in a sexist way, as a hissy fit. (While the phrase hissy fits is "gendered", I don't think that the act of throwing these public tantrums are the sole terrain of the white women who support Hillary. But I will save my Baby Boomer rant for a separate post).

Let me back up a little here and tell you that last Friday, Mr. Scob and I saw Susan Estrich speak. Estrich is the author of a book The Case for Hillary Clinton (which is discounted at Amazon down to $7.99). Since Estrich herself was pretty indignant that the media had highlighted such petty details as Hillary's voice and style of dress, I won't describe hers, except to say that a) Jackie Mason called, and he wants his schtick back and b) she never met a Marlboro Light she didn't smoke, I think. Anyway. The woman is one of the most accomplished public intellectuals in the country and hinted ever so slightly that she actually has a more nuanced view of gender in America than she let on, BUT I completely disagreed with her on 96% of what she was talking about.

Specifically, she is still aggrieved by the fact that there are only a few Fortune 500 CEOs who are women, and that women are still a minority in the partnerships of major law firms, and there are only 12 female senators, and that worst of all, we still need to wait for a woman POTUS. This is all predicated on a belief that the world would be a more just, kinder, better run and more equitable place if women were in charge. I happen to not agree with that underlying assumption but putting it aside, since neither of us have been able to test our hypothesis, she is basically saying this: If only all of the people in charge had certain physical attributes, the world would be a better place. Sorry to be so dramatic, but how is this different from eugenics, or Nazi anti-semitism or any other racist system? I don't support the status quo, but I also don't see how gender characteristics alone will change society.

Of course, I am not sure that Susan Estrich or Hillary Clinton want to dramatically change society. They want to change the social order - so that women will have the power. But they don't want particularly to upend the hierarchical model. Estrich said something particularly telling (imagine this shouted through gravel): "Well, sure, it's all equal at the bottom!" Actually, its not. Its an intense pecking order "at the bottom", where everyone is trying to reassure themselves that they are not, in fact, at the bottom, by shitting on other people. Racism, sexism, xenophobia, homophobia, are much more pronounced "at the bottom". It's "at the bottom" where you really feel what it means to make 63 female cents on the male-earned dollar.

And so yeah, Sam, I do think there are women who exist who think that somehow its more in their interest to either vote with the political elite or withhold their own power in protest against interests of others. Five months is a long time, of course, and by November these folks will remember what their broader values are, but they won't like it. This was supposed to be their election and now it isn't and they are going to pout.

The Water Shortage Has Not Hit This House

While East Bay MUD is talking water rationing, my kids have been on a bathing tear in all this heat. I am not sure why higher temperatures also necessitate wiping themselves all over with dirt and over-ripe fruit, but it does, and so they bathe.




And then there's the other one, who can't even make into the tub before he needs to get wet.

Good Reading

I present this without comment. Actually, no, I have to say "WOW."

Also in my wheelhouse tonight. Spot on.

My New BPN

I haven't really been keeping up on my scorn of Berkeley Parents Network lately, and I'm sorry for that. I haven't been reading the newsletters lately, plus, how many times can I read about whether its normal for 7-year-olds to be clairvoyant, babies to cry and husbands to secretly look at porn? Been there, done that.

My new Berkeley-esque guilty pleasure is Freecycle. With Freecycle, you give stuff away instead of throwing it in the trash. Logical, right? And for the most part (based on three days of membership) it involves IKEA lamps, packing peanuts and humidifiers. That is, people want to give those away or get them. But here's why I know I will like it. Today, one post was:

TAKEN: 80s R&B Cassettes
Bag full of cassettes, mostly 80s R&B like Bell Biv Devoe, New Edition, Boyz II Men, etc. Please send phone # to arrange pickup.

In other words, someone offered cassettes of BBD, New Edition, and Boyz II Men (yes, they are separate groups) for free, and someone else took them. Voila! How lovely is that!?

Time to Put Your Obama Pants On

I can't let all this spare energy go to waste. So some of you have probably already received a fundraising email from me for the Obama campaign. I promise I will only bug the shit out of you a little bit about this. The best way to silence my incessant nagging is to just go ahead and donate, and then I will leave the nagging to the Obama campaign. If you didn't get my email, visit my fundraising webpage, and donate, please.

There's something about the closure of the primary season that makes it feel like the election's over and Obama's our President. But that ain't the case, so get a good night sleep, and get back in the game. That's my plan.

THANKS.

And yes, I will occasionally try to return to my pithy, cynical non-political posts one of these days.

They Like Me, They Really Really . . .

My vote count is up to 5684. I don't know, I think that's cool. I am 600 votes behind the lowest vote-getting winner, and about 1300 votes above the next person behind me. So why am I clustered near the winners but the next person is so far behind? It raises questions about the value of endorsements and the effort those who endorse you put into your election. I got more endorsements than Janet Flint (the person next in order), and among a couple groups that did GOTV efforts. On the other hand, I got an endorsement from a group that did a mailer only, and while Janet didn't get that endorsement (due to somewhat confusing rules about when your questionnaire had to be turned in), I don't think the mailers had much to do with me getting more votes. Because our slate, of which Janet was a part, did a mailer to nearly 30,000 voters, plus we distributed another 8,000 by hand. All this elliptical thinking (which I am doing in my head and not in this post) suggest a couple campaign truisms:

1. Going door to door to door is the best way to win votes. This trumps mailers and endorsements, which (see below) reinforce the voter contact.
2. Otherwise, people need to see your name seven times to remember it well enough to vote for you.

Its all very interesting to me. Among other questions it raises, I wonder, how do political scientists dare call them scientists? There's basically no way to do a peer reviewed, double-blind election.

Novel Insults

A child at my son's preschool said to him today, in a taunting tone, "Your dad's name is Jeffrey and your mom's name is Benjamin." And than added, "FOKEY Benjamin!"

My vote tally has risen to 5324, although my position in the race is undisturbed.

Let the Changing Begin

In my fog about my own election (now Hillary can be my best girlfriend: "we lost elections together!"), I failed to properly acknowledge how incredible it is that Obama clinched the nomination. It matters.
One way it matters is that it has thrilled the Black and international communities, and already begun the process of racial healing that Obama talked about in his speech. These are, respectively, cultural and foreign policy shifts.

Today, Obama has caused a huge procedural shift as well. The New York Times has reported that, "the D.N.C. will no longer accept contributions from federal lobbyists or political action committees, which follows the rules he established for his own campaign last year." This is a dramatic change, and hopefully will spur other candidates to make the same rule change. Then the strings attached to political money will be voters' strings. I know that corporations and wealthy donors will still have the thicker strings, so to speak, but this is a good first step, and shows the ways that Obama understands how this tangled web works.

The Concession Post

Having noted below that there really isn't a forum for a concession, I realized I could just designate this as my forum and go ahead and concede, even though my opponents don't read my blog. Anyway, I am disappointed, and I didn't realize how disappointed until the day wore on.

First of all, as an effort of the Grassroots Progressives slate, the outcome was phenomenal. Karen Weinstein was re-elected with an unstoppable lead, and Ces Rosales and Edie Irons unseated two incumbents. Two of the other incumbents who were re-elected promised to work to increase the committee's activities in a slate platform that was very similar to ours. Now there is a set of priorities they can be held to in the next election, which hasn't happened before. The final committee member who was re-elected has been on the committee close to one million years, and she came in fourth, rather than first. Other great outcomes: we all know more about political campaigns than we ever did before, and we met great people, including each other.

For me, I didn't come in last, or even second from last. I feel like I got a respectable number of votes. I got 4527 votes. Just for comparison, Jody London, who won the school board seat from our district, got 5707 votes to win. Granted, its a smaller area she was running in, but I still got a lot of votes. Tony Thurmond, who was endorsed for the Assembly by every major paper in the Bay Area got 4345 votes, and Nancy Skinner, who won that race, got 10904 votes. That's just more than twice what I got. So we ran a competitive race and did a good job, and we will all do better in our future races.

That's my silver lining speech.

On the personal note, I had a terrible hearing today. It was the third day of this public hearing on a single job classification. It has been long, boring and contentious. Today one of the commissioners recused himself after yelling at the employer's witness. He was furious at what he perceived to be her mismanagement and disrespectful attitude towards the people in his region. He was right. I was very sorry to lose him from the process and it set in motion a huge set of hassles that were demonstrative of the backasswardedness of the public sector. Truly Kafkaesque. Then the employer's attorney made a veiled threat about actions that might be taken against a witness, and I sort of lost my shit. Fortunately, we weren't in the presence of the commissioners, but wow, it shook me up. I was really upset and angry for the mercifully short rest of the day.

Where am I going with this? Well, what I realized on my way home from the hearing was just how disappointed I was not to have been elected. I was looking forward to all the new opportunities for change in this system, and in my own life. I guess I could be thankful that I am being spared from another bureaucratic nightmare (as I understand the Central Committee occasionally can be). But I loved running for office and fantasizing about all the interesting ways that the local party could be better, and its a let-down to not even have those to conjure. The stupidity of this hearing made me want to do more and feel sad that I won't have this opportunity this time.

Check Yourself

If you go to the Alameda County Registrar of Voters website, you can watch results yourself. Its the Central Committee race for the 14th Assembly District.

Update #53 or whatever

Turns out that there is not a forum for a concession speech in the race for Alameda County Democratic Central Committee, which is sort of bummy. There aren't any new results buit its late and I have a hearing tomorrow. I will post a link for the results when I can.

Update - what? #6?

58 percent reporting and no movement. My slate mates (the 3 who are winning) are trying to be reassuring but I doubt I am going to leapfrog 3 other candidates including two of my slate people. "People of the Slate". Does that sound like a modern "Clan of the Cave Bear"?

There is a political consultant talking about about one of the assembly candidates and he said, "the guy couldn't put the odd in his back pocket." funny.ish. The candidate had a pager, not a cell phone. That wasn't the only example of his oddity, just the only I think I can tell.

Nothing new

But some observations:
1. the precincts we walked haven't reported.
2. Hanging out with political addicts is way cooler than watching results come in alone, because you can speculate wildly over dozens of races instead of just one or 2.
3. When you say you don't take it personally, you can't take it personally.

Update #4

22% reporting and I haven't budged from my spot. Quell annoying.

Update #3

9 precincts reporting and the positions haven't changed. I am 400 votes from being a contender. I feel like Joe Lieberman in New Hampshire in 2003.

Fuckin' nuffin'

Still no new results.

Update #1

Nothing has changed on the count but now "our campaign manager" has decided to dissect the existing results like they're biblical. Not helpful.

Live Bloggin' Election Results

The first results have been posted and with 0.0% precincts reporting, I am not in the top 6. Three of my slate mates are though, soooo, that's good. I am going to pretend like I know something and say that its the mail ballots that came back before our mailer went out. Still, I am vaguely bummed.

Some Final Notes on the Campaign

The election is on Tuesday (that's June 3) and I am not sure there is a lot more that I can do at this point to win it. I raised nearly $5000, and with my slate, mailed 30,000 fliers to voters. We had over 30 volunteers and walked almost every precinct in our assembly district. Tomorrow and Tuesday, we will be out at BART stations handing out more fliers. Others on my slate have been phoning voters to introduce themselves. I have gained a lot of insight into the political process, which, as a blogger, I will now share:

How to read campaign literature: We have been completely inundated with campaign literature in our house because there are competitive state assembly, state senate and city council races. It might be annoying but it is the only way candidates in these races can get information to voters. There is certainly no TV coverage, and very little newspaper coverage, of these races. So although these folks share largely similar political goals, their methods and messages are very different. I am much more "friendly" towards these mailers than I have been in the past for that reason. You also need to see who, in fact, paid for the mailers. If its not from the candidate, then ask why this organization might favor the candidate rather than another. And although the mailers all seem to say the same thing, they don't really.

All this dawned on me because of an unpleasant interaction I had with a voter while I was precinct walking yesterday. He refused to take my flier because, "I don't read biased campaign literature. have my own source for information." When I pointed out that I was a candidate and he could just ask me directly about what I planned to do, he smiled coldly and walked away. It creeped me out and made me angry. People form opinions based on word-of-mouth rather than by having even the slightest curiosity about the facts. It's messed up. It's just like my earlier posts about Obama and labor. Many folks in Labor were against Obama without even trying to determine what his actual record or proposed policies were. And that's minor compared with rumors about him being Muslim.

Campaigning matters: Despite the word-of-mouth, or maybe because of it, campaigning matters. Only a few of the incumbents on the Democratic Central Committee have done any campaigning, and much of that seems too little, too late. The people we talk to are happy to learn a name they can vote for, and agree that new blood is needed. When asked, folks agree to share our fliers with other voters in their homes or with their friends. In other races, a lot of candidates are going door-to-door. Take advantage of that if they come to your house, and ask them whatever you want to know.

People are incredibly patient, generous and friendly: This is not a point I would have believed before I started this. And by "People", I largely mean my friends, but also my neighbors and the complete strangers whose lives I have interrupted.

I will maybe live-blog the results, which will be posted on-line as they are tallied on Tuesday night. Thanks again for caring.

Kids Say the Darnedest Things

This morning at the airplane museum, Li told me that one plane that was in pieces in the corner of the yard was a "urine-peein'" plane.

I Wish They Would Poll Me

Qua White Woman, I am not "cold towards Obama". When.Will.This.End?

A Lot of New Shit Has Come to Light

A friend from high school sent me a distressed email about my assertion that one of two brothers we had known back then had killed himself or died or something (this is in re Skill Crane). I think I was wrong, and so I need to correct the record. I don't think either of those brothers is dead. One seems to teach at the University of Kansas, and I can't really discern what the older one is doing, based on his MySpace page, but he certainly does seem to be alive. Which raises the question, why was I crying about Skill Crane at the Bridgeport Diner with Radioboy back in 1998? It makes no sense AT ALL.

In other news, me and Junior were looking out the front window last night, and this lanky art student dude walked by, and Li says: "Is he a stranger?"
Me: Yes
L: Is he a good stranger or bad stranger?
Me: I don't know but since he's a stranger, we don't talk to him, right? You don't know if a stranger is good or bad so you just don't talk to them, do you understand?
Li: I think he's a BAD stranger. (he said with a growl)
Me: What are the only strangers you can talk to? (the correct answer here is "Helpers", per Mr. Rogers)

Without missing a beat, Li says, "Shia LaBeouf" and then falls out laughing.

Again, it makes no sense at all.

Good Luck, But Not Good Bye

If you haven't already read Ryan's blog, please go over and check it out. He's just posted his last post. He is an amazing guy, and a hero of mine. I don't have (much) weight to lose, but I have other overwhelming goals and he really makes me feel like I can tackle them.

And Another

While I am letting other people's videos stand in for my own wit, here's a good one:

San Francisco Values

hahahahaha (wipes tear out of eye). This is awesome:

I Am En Fuego Today, at least on my blog

That last post concerns a near-spontaneous cuddle party style work site. Does work get accomplished? Now go and see for yourself.

Or check out the Vice Presidential Prognisticatin'. Funny.

Here's an Idea

What do you think about this? Jelly.

And Speaking of Bug Out Society

While we are on the topic, and god bless YouTube, here's another BOS video from my NJ yout.

For the Record

I don't hate Skill Cranes. I think I must have been very drunk that night at the diner in Bridgeport where I waxed hysterical about the kid I knew from high school who died. How sad and messed up that I can't even remember the kid's name. It was either Bill or Bob. They were brothers who skateboarded with a high school boyfriend, and one of them died. ANYWAY, the connection to Skill Crane comes from this Bug Out Society video that the brothers loved.

Yup, I Still Hate Theater

As part of our Arts Trek: NYC Edition, B and I went to see August: Osage County on Saturday night. The reviews for this play were so over-the-top (for example) that I thought it could be the one to turn me around on not liking plays. Not so. Here's what I didn't like about it, and why it supports my generally dim view of plays.

1. The acting, while better than most plays, is broad and exaggerated. Acting in a theater calls for techniques that enable every person in the audience to understand the gestures and dialogue on the stage. But sweeping movements and Keystone Kops antics, along with shouted sotto voce remarks, are totally unnatural. This makes even likable characters and good actors unbelievable.

2. The show was long. Three hours and 20 minutes. It moved surprisingly quickly, for the length, but still felt to me as though the playwright was self-indulgent. There were too many plot quirks thrown in, and it came off feeling like secondhand Faulkner or Tennessee Williams crossed with One Life to Live: Osage County.

3. There was a mythical Native American character, Johna. It's baffling to me why she isn't referred to in the NY Times review. Her presence in the show is beyond irritating and offensive. She is intended to be the soul bearer of the father, and she is as pure and righteous as a Dime Store Indian. There are two minor points in the play that are intended to diffuse the obnoxious stereotyping but I didn't think they were effective in the face of Johna's inexplicable goodness and fortitude. Why would she continue to work for these people? Which leads to my next complaint about plays: They traffic in Big Ideas. The medium doesn't do the ideas justice, however, so instead they seem like childish points to score extra credit on a philosophy exam.

4. The audience REALLY annoyed me. They laughed far louder than the jokes warranted, and were far more invested in the characters than they probably are in their own families. At the end the second act, when the oldest daughter yells, "I'M IN CHARGE NOW!", a man actually yelled, "YEAHHH!!" I hated them all except the guy sitting next to me.

So why is this play nominated for 8 Tony's? Here's my guess for the categories in which it was nominated:

• Tallest Set
• Most Number of Drunk Characters in a Drama
• Slyest Reference to a Taboo Sex Act
• Most Overbearing Mother Character
• Best Representation of Academics in a Drama
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• Most Inexplicable Use of Eric Clapton as a Plot Device
• Most Sheeplike Audience

Why I Hate the Things I Hate

UPDATED at 11:44 a.m. (I KNEW I could count on Ella to help me out here)

BD and I are going to NYC this weekend, and he wants to take in a play (I hear that’s what you do when you go to a play – you “take it in”), and that got my thinking about how much I hate plays. And then my cousin mentioned that he knew I hate plaintiffs’ attorneys (which I don’t), and I thought: There’s a lot of misinformation out there about what I hate and why. This calls for a blog post.

1. Theater – Its true; I hate Theater. This is based on my dual aversions to strong emotions and bad acting. I am not crazy about Art Films for the same reason. Mind you, I am not a stoic. I feel emotions very strongly. Plus I am the Queen of Willing Suspension of Disbelief, which means I feel strong emotions very easily. But afterwards, after I have cried and feel all emotionally wrung out, I feel used and a little dirty. For example, I cried through all of Little Man Tate. I just felt like an ass after that. Really? Little Man Tate? I feel like a cry-whore just remembering it. Okay, so that’s not Theater, and its not Art Film, so my point isn’t being made very well. BUT. My first roommate in college starred in a production of Agnes of God, which was both Theater and Art Film, and I felt like crap after watching it. Big Themes, Moving Story, Heartfelt Performances. Yuck.
2. Soup – I have a love/hate relationship with soup. I will eat soup and often think that a specific soup tastes good. But I don’t think soup is a meal and it annoys me when people treat it like a meal. I do hate cold soup. Just the word Gazpacho makes me feel a little sick to my stomach. On the other hand, I like the soup party. A part of me wishes that we had an annual pulled pork party instead, but you take your husband for richer and for poorer, for soup and for pork.
   
3. Sandwiches – This is a corollary hatred. I don’t think sandwiches are a meal. I also think they have too much bread (no matter how little bread they have). That said, I eat sandwiches almost every day, because even the popularity of the Atkins diet has not convinced me that its acceptable to eat just salami and cheese right off your lap with your fingers.
4. Burning Man
5. Berkeley - there are too many posts to even add one single link here. If you need evidence, just look there to the right and read the categories Bay Area, things that annoy me, and BPN. Smile Rockridge might have some material on this particular hatred, but it would be a more general dislike of things that are Berkeley-esque, as opposed to be specifically about Berkeley.
   
6. Baby Boomers
7. Sideways
8. Chinese Food: Its not Asian food that I hate, its Chinese food. Because I love Japanese and Indian, and occasionally crave Thai. I am not crazy about Korean food, but the issue just doesn't come up that much. But Chinese food is shorthand for "don't feel like cooking, don't feel like eating out", and it almost universally has too much sauce on it. Goopy sauce. Dare I say, it's soupy sauce. Also, my mom dated a Chinese man for several years and I ate a lot of Chinese food during that period and I feel like I had my lifetime supply already.
   
9. Short Stories: Yeah, its true. I think that this is due in part to the Theater/Art Film phenom, which is that short stories are intended to Make a Point, usually by being shocking or sad. When they are funny, they are essays, not short stories (see David Sedaris and Ian Frazier, both of whom I like). I like long books, because if you see something sad coming, you can either put the book down for a little while until you are ready to deal with it, or the book keeps going after that, so you know that not everyone will be dead at the end.
   

The Occasional Grab Bag

Its been hard to blog lately, for a couple of reasons. First of all, I am obsessed with politics, both national and my own local race, and since I can't gauge the enthusiasm of my readership for this topic (I think that pork roll got more love), I don't want to bore you to death. For next, I have been spending a lot of time in the car, and in anticipation of the coming illegalization of driving with a cell phone, or whatever, I am trying not to type and drive at the same time. Trying is the operative word but by July 1, I hope to be weaned from this nasty habit. Other reasons: the kids are less adorable now that they talk back; work is boring (there, I said it): no one has tried to unload clarinet instructions in months and the Afghan for Afghans plan is so far advanced, I can't make fun of it for fear of offending every last person I work with. The Wire has been off the air for months. Nelson Marans has been having some trouble getting published.

So what does that leave me?

1. Well, there's a new baby giraffe at the Oakland Zoo which, at least in the photos, is freaking adorable.

2. My older child now says things like, "If the astronauts want to travel to a new place, Mars is their best bet", " If we kill all the fish, it will hurt the planet", and "What's Buffalo Soldier?" This is a lot of stuff to answer to, and that was all basically in the 20 minutes before dinner tonight. Junior Jr. also has a lot of say, but it's in Spanglish, so we are still in the new exchange-student phase of communication: lots of smiling, nodding, waving of hands, and proclamations of joy when we understand one another. Then we repeat the understood phrase back to one another for a few minutes and all share a good laugh over it.

3. Michelle Obama lists Sudoku as an interest on her Facebook profile.

4. Our slate mailer went out on Friday and it looks great. I have gotten over 96,000 Google adword impressions and its only cost like $16. (In other words, if you live in my area and do a search for certain keywords, an ad promoting my candidacy will pop up).

4. We had 25 people distributing flyers on doorsteps on Saturday and "dropped" over 2000 flyers. Remember, only about 50% of people who will vote in June will even vote in this race. I really just need people to see my overlong name a couple times and then they will vote for me out of pure "that is a long-ass name" psychology. (That's an actual term of political science art, just ask Gov. Schwartzenegger)

5. I went to Redwood City today and gas was $4.49 a gallon. Holy crap.

A Disquisition on the Influence of Children's Media

Li is really interested in the Dino Attack video game on the Lego website, which has caused me to wonder what effect the stuff he sees has on his behavior and his values. Will be violently stalk the broken streets of an abandoned subdivision, gunning down crazed velociraptors? Who knows what the future brings.

But then I started thinking about the Scooby Doo Factor. Much ado is made about the effect of media on children. But I would wager that no crime has ever been committed that entails a spry but elderly man who pretends to be a ghost, a Yeti, a "carnival creeper", or a "seaside slimer" in order to lay claim to the secret treasure of a sprawling estate or Demon Island.

Make of that what you will.

On the other hand, Scooby Doo did inspire someone to do this here cross-stitch. No, I'm not kidding.

Shout Out

Maybe the best part about the tense vote reports from Lake County has been getting to know the various mayors of the region. In particular, I want to give a big round of applause to Gary Mayor Rudy Clay for having the best facial hair of the campaign. I want this man's portrait in the National Gallery.

This Is Why Obama Is Running for President and I'm Not

Obama's response to Carville.

Total Gross-out

James Carville makes me want to barf.

So now I have to imagine HRC with three testicles?

When will this end?

A Little Low-end Political Commentary

I watched Obama on Tim Russert* this morning. Russert tried to redeem his obscene debate performance by asking the same questions he asked last week all over again, as if to legitimize them. Shut. Up. Tim. Russert.
And I was annoyed that Obama didn't just say, in response to one of the several Jeremiah Wright questions, "Tim, I think the American people are more interested at this point in hearing how I will end our dependence onoil from the middle east." After 20 minutes of that redundant bullshit, why didn't he just answer the questions he wants to answer and ignore Russert?

*its hard not type Russet, especially because of the resemblance he has to the potato. And I am not just saying that because its the cattiest thing I can think of; its also true.

Now I Remember

We see Juno the other night, which I thought was funnyish and cute, mostly because I could watch Michael Cera paint the house. Not because he's hot; he just cracks me up. Anyway, on my drive to Ukiah last night, I figured out what annoyed me about it. Basically, its this: there is no relationship between the soundtrack amd the main character. Normally this doesn't matter too much in the movie. In this case, Juno is an Iggy Pop/Mott the Hoople fan. But she hates Sonic Youth and sings Moldy Peaches. The soundtrack is so twee that twee thinks its too twee. Iggy Pop would vomit on this soundtrack, even today in his geriatric state. I like the soundtrack but its annoying.

A Smattering of Random Thoughts From Ukiah

Why couldn't the good people of early Northern California come up with more diverse names for their towns? There is Ukiah, Eureka and Yreka (home to Robert Trebor's Yreka Bakery). There's Geyserville and Garberville. And then there's Weed. Regardless, its pretty beautiful here if you don't look too closely at the inhabited areas.

Oh man, I had some other stuff I wanted to talk about but now its gone from my mind. Sheesh. Getting old is a bitch.